Nominated for the Liebster Award for Domestic Abuse Advocacy Blog!

Thank you my fighting friend for the recognition and nomination for Liebster Award in blogging to end Domestic Violence. My target is about ending the harm we have been numbed to accepting within our family unit. The child abuse, the attacks on partners/spouses, the parental alienation which then turns into grandparent alienation. Our family units have been broken and twisted by what has been found acceptable in our homes. How can we tell our children we are looking out for your best interest then beat them, molest & rape them, emotionally destory all that they are inside and leave them abandoned in a world of hell. How can we say I love you to someone then in that same breath reach out and tear them apart, ripping them from the soul and causing severe physical harm? How can we as a society sit back and become so numb to all the evil that exists within our family unit and within our homes? Today matters in at least one person’s life and your kindness and caring attention could be what saves them from years of pain. We must do this as a united strong stand around the world if we ever expect to change these human behaviors and acceptance in our relationships. It is an honor to receive your nomination and I respect all you are doing. In kindness, respect, and full support of your efforts, sincerely Trish McKnight

Published by @ButterflyTrish

I am a survivor of over thirty years trapped inside the silence and brutality of Family Crimes, Child Sex Trafficking, and a life-lived pattern of tolerance for over thirty years in almost murderous relationships. In Feb. 2011, I chose to publish the truth about what happened in our home, the community around me, and the learned patterns of self-hatred and tolerance which became such a huge factor in my life. I never felt worthy of life, breathing, love & respect; not until I honestly began a strong focus on healing myself. There were many traits and tragedies that influenced my life. It seemed to control everything inside me and it was nothing but sadness and fake emotions. Only by facing the horrors I went through, the choices I made as a woman & mother, then relating to the greatest guilt I still grieve; how the trauma behavior has affected my children's lives. It's my hope to help others get through their battles, regardless of the type of trauma because when we hurt our lives are forever changed. "My Justice' is not an easy read. It was published to release the thick layers of trauma, sex trafficking, and disfiguring neglect, the enslavement of a child to answer the ring of 'his' bell, and keep my own private terrorist alive. This memoir is NOT SUGGESTED FOR ANYONE UNDER 16 years of age. It discusses the permanently wounding life and the cycle of destruction that held me in expecting/tolerating ridicule and violence in my adult relationships. This truth was published to inspire others to take an in-depth look at their life and behaviors as a result of their past. When we connect the dots through rebuilding an understanding of the pattern of adult choices in coping addictions, parenting, and partners; even affecting our careers and self-sustainable life. I'm so honored to have 'My Justice' used at the collegiate level for psychology classes, upcoming therapists, and educators. Today my life is very blessed. I'm finally safe, finally truly loved, finally feeling the magic of what life is supposed to be like. My greatest power only began to show when I first made the choice to end the violent relationships and behaviors around my children; to give them something better, something SAFE!! In choosing to share my own story, I've also gone the serious extra step to educate myself through years of research, attending training opportunities, and collaborating with other advocate resources focused in human resilience and healing from abuse, sexual harm, and sex trafficking. Today there are experts digging deep to recreate help and healing. I've chosen to use my past as a way to inspire a greater good and; hopefully, somehow change the cycle of tragedy in our homes so that we empower our kids to live a more positive path. The best education we can give is healing our survivors of traumatic experiences so we understand what they felt then and what they wish they would have had available; those who could have and should have said something. We can change things for our life today, but best of all in healing our wounds, we give communities a supportive working strategy in assisting the people in our lives. One step at a time, one caring soul at a time, we can give them a path to changing our human society as a whole. This is a tell-all, which was written in the midst of my third nervous breakdown as I struggled to put all my distorted pieces back together, and help my children understand how the violence I tolerated against me invaded their well-being. My children have always been my world, but my behaviors, lack of healthy parenting and life skills, and an inability to remain stable have caused another generation of suffering for my grandchildren. This is a very difficult thing to watch and the continued tragedies that seem to keep affecting the choices in my family. Writing this book was only the beginning of trying to release all that has haunted me for so many years. I have finally removed his thick, cruel, coal-stained hand which trapped me in fear for decades. Those hands and his evil, her housemaid and caregiver; created a slave, and that slave submitted to horrific and brutal attacks but always felt it was her burden to bear. I lived with that hand holding me down, continually terrorizing and silencing, stealing my voice to protect their pure evil. Throughout decades the dysfunction caused by the chaos inside my head would affect every relationship, my children, and cast a shadow of darkness on everything good in my life. Living in the true spirit of freedom, I have now become a strong advocate against the life cycle of human destruction. If we want to control our life and achievements today, then we cannot live stuck in the tragedy of hardships and pain. Life is meant to be lived, to be enjoyed, to see what you can do and what you can achieve, to find out what is important to you. We all become adults. We all have a burden to bear. Stand up and keep moving, keep living, keep dreaming. You have two choices in recreating and rebuilding yourself. Do you stay stuck in the dark shadows of your past? Do you dig deep and find that spirit that kept you alive so that you could become the proud, strong, capable, resilient, kind human being? Which do you choose and how will that choice affect your children and theirs? We can be supportive, and provide resources and suggestions for help so that families suffering from addiction or past trauma can find a recovery balance to rebuild their family into a more positive life pattern. We will recover, we will rebuild, we will conquer the pains of yesterday to live in the true sense of life, freedom, and safety today. Patricia 'Trish' McKnight Author: 'My Justice' Fndr/CEO: Butterfly Dreams Alliance, NFP Mentor/Advocate/Speaker/Survivor

2 thoughts on “Nominated for the Liebster Award for Domestic Abuse Advocacy Blog!

  1. I like the internet. Where one can journal to one’s hearts content and never have to fear that somebody is going to read it and accuse the author of a horrible crime. When I was 19, I had a drawer full of things I had been writing for the past two years, beginning when I was still in high school. One weekend, my mom was in my bedroom, and she went through this drawer and read every one of those pages that I had been writing for two years, and I got home, and she accused me of wanting and planning to kill her. I was so shaken up by this experience that I took all of it down to the incinerator and burned it and never wrote anything down on paper for 25 years. The experience did two things. First, it taught me to keep everything inside and not let it out. Second it told me that anything I was thinking should never be expressed, for no one could be trusted. Twenty five years of this. At the age of 45, I experienced the death of my father. My mother had died twelve years prior to this time. I was married to my second husband, who was more abusive than the first, who had taken my first three kids and molested the oldest two. My fourth child had been molested by his grandfather. My life was a disaster area. I had previously thought I was too dumb to go to college, everybody had told me that. However, I enrolled in college, not telling anybody how dumb I was. Guess what? I had to write to get through college. I had forgotten what a thrill it was to write. For 25 years, I had not written anything. Now, I was coming out of the woodwork. There was nothing stopping me. It took me thirteen years to get through college, but I achieved my Master’s Degree in English Composition, and started teaching Community College in Southern California. Now, I am doing all sorts of things; counseling, publishing, writing, and teaching. Anything I can do to further a sane community. Claudia Barlow

    Date: Tue, 18 Mar 2014 15:41:15 +0000 To:

    1. Ms. Barlow, what an honor to have your comments and your spirit shared here. How I admire your determination and courage to build and survive as the person you wanted to be. It is always phenomenal to connect with another who is thriving, even in our struggles, as we continue the healing and recovery process. blessings & respect always, trish 😉

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