A note from the author: Hope, Courage, Change in our society

 

You see this bright blue eyed cutie; well I thought she was gone forever. I really thought they, my parents, had destroyed all that was wonderful about her. However, I feel her and she is right here with me always. She lives inside and still reminds me everyday; now I am safe, loved, and respected for the simple person I‘ve become. She is right there to guide me through and always brings joy to my heart. She has endured vicious and ugly wounding, but she is still very much alive. She has doubted herself constantly, felt truly unworthy of ever being accepted, and lost all hope of ever finding love. She has risen above their pain to laugh once again, to feel blessed once again, to shine those incredible blue eyes and pray that the world will hear her voice. Every time a survivor who has read her story, ‘My Justice’, she prays they find their one stand of hope to keep them going and know that they too matter; their pain is just as tragic but with patience and reconnecting with who they are, they too will shine as they deserve and live in all the beauty, just as they should have done before the dark storms of pain turned them inside out.

‘ My Justice is read by the hundreds of those who have the power and the contacts to pass it forward and let her story be told. One day she will be heard. One day her determination to change what has infected her family so horribly will be recognized for the evil it was back then. Its not about her rescue, for she has survived beyond all comprehension. Its not about being recognized, for she is definitely loved by many. Its not about the sadness she has carried, for the tears are all dry by the tender hands that hold her. It is about what this child has to share so that no child should suffer this horrendous pain ever again. It is about what this child has to say that just might change your thoughts, give you hope of a better tomorrow, and most of all to share the love she feels inside for all those who have endured the pains of harm and have themselves conquered the demons within to rise above and truly laugh in love‘s warm embrace.

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  If you have read her story, ‘My Justice‘; I pray for those still struggling, still trying to hang in there, still trying to conquer and escape that you will pass it forward to another. Let her voice be heard, let her justice be felt, as she has now removed the coal stained hand that crept into her world and took away her greatest weapon of protection, the hand that took away this precious child’s voice and silenced her in evil until one day the sun shined down on the person would once again breathe life into her soul. Thank you my friends for accepting and loving me in all my imperfect, but still so truly bright and shining ways.

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You will find ‘My Justice’ and various purchasing links by visiting www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com….

Pledge to become your “FAMILY DEFENDER” today!!! Thank you

 

Published by @ButterflyTrish

I am a survivor of over thirty years trapped inside the silence and brutality of Family Crimes, Child Sex Trafficking, and a life lived pattern of tolerance for over 30 years in almost murderous relationships. In Feb. 2011 I chose to publish the truth about what happened in our home, the community around me, and the learned patterns of self-hatred and tolerance which became such a huge factor in my life. My life today was built through publishing 'My Justice'. I never would felt worthy of life, breathing, love & respect with first healing myself. There were many things the traits and tragedies that influenced my life seemed to control everything inside me and it was nothing but sadness and fake emotions. Only by facing the horrors I went through, the choices I made as a woman & mother, then relating to the greatest guilt I have; how the trauma behavior has affected my children's lives. It's my hope to help others get through their battles, regardless of the type of trauma because when we hurt our lives are forever changed. This graphic, violent memoir is NOT SUGGESTED FOR ANYONE UNDER 14 years of age. It discusses the permanently wounding life and the cycle of destruction that held me in expecting/tolerating ridicule and violence in my adult relationships. This truth was published to inspire others to take an in-depth look at their life and behaviors as a result of their past. Connect the dots of your rebuilding in understanding the pattern of adult choices in coping addictions, parenting, and partners; even affecting our careers and self-sustainable life. I'm so honored to have 'My Justice' used at the collegiate level for psychology classes, upcoming therapists and educators. Today my life is very blessed. I'm finally safe, finally truly loved, finally feeling the magic of what life is supposed to be like. My greatest power only began to show when I first made the choice to end the violent relationships and behaviors around my children; to give them something better, something SAFE!! In choosing to share my own story, I've also gone that serious extra step to educate myself through years of research, attending training opportunity, and collaborating with other advocate resources, abuse, sexual harm, and the experts digging deep to recreate help and healing. I've chosen to use my past as a way to inspire a greater good; hopefully somehow change the cycle of tragedy in our homes so that we empower our kids to live a more positive path. The best education we can give, is a survivor of traumatic experiences who can use what they felt then and what they wish they would have had available; those who could have and should have said something. We can change things for our life today, but best of all in healing our wounds, we give communities a supportive working strategy in assisting the people in our lives. One step at a time, one caring soul at a time, we can give them a path to changing our human society as a whole. This is a tell all, which was written in the midst of my third nervous breakdown as I struggled to put all my distorted pieces back together, help my children understand how the violence I tolerated against me invaded their emotional well-being. My children have always been my world, but my behaviors, lack of healthy parenting and life skills, and an inability to remain stable has caused another generation of suffering for my grandchildren. This is a very difficult thing to watch and the continued tragedies that seem to keep affecting the choices in my family. Writing this book was only the beginning of trying to release all that has haunted me for so many years. I have finally removed his thick, cruel, coal stained hand which trapped me in fear for decades. Those hands and his evil, her housemaid and caregiver; they created a slave and that slave submitted to horrific and brutal attacks but always felt it was her burden to bare. I lived with that hand holding me down to terrorize and steal away my voice, holding me captive in the dysfunction of the aftermath and casting a shadow of darkness on everything good in my life. Living in the true spirit of freedom, I have now become a strong advocate against the life cycle of human destruction. We cannot live stuck in the tragedy of hardships and pain. Life is meant to be lived, to be enjoyed, to see what you can do and what you can achieve, to find out what is important to you. We all become adults. We all have a burden to bare. Stand up and keep moving, keep living, keep dreaming. You have two choices in recreating and rebuilding yourself. Do you stay stuck in the dark shadows of your past? Do you dig deep and find that spirit that kept you alive so that you could become the proud, strong, capable, resilient, kind human being ? Which do you choose and how will that choice affect your children and theirs? We can be supportive, provide resources and suggestions for help so that families suffering with addiction or past trauma themselves can find a recovery balance to rebuild their family in a more positive life pattern. We will recover, we will rebuild, we will conquer the pains of yesterday to live in the true sense of life, freedom and safety today. Patricia 'Trish' McKnight Author: 'My Justice' Fndr/CEO: Butterfly Dreams Alliance, NFP Mentor/Advocate/Speaker/Survivor

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