Its a Family Affair – Pedophilia, should it be an accepted act? 03/10 by Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery | Self Help Podcasts

Its a Family Affair – Pedophilia, should it be an accepted act? 03/10 by Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery | Self Help Podcasts.

Pedophilia, should it be an accepted act today??? BUTTERFLY DREAMS TALK RADIO – HOT TOPIC FEATURE BLOG TONIGHT w/ guest cohost Michal Madison. Live calls at 347-215-7754 or join in the chatroom. How can we protect the souls of our children???

My Justice – Patricia A. McKnight : AuthorHouse

My Justice – Patricia A. McKnight : AuthorHouse.

“He had a balding head of strawberry blond hair and thick rimmed black glasses. When I made eye contact with him and saw the shine in his cold blue eyes, the hair on the back of my neck started to quiver. This man was evil and I could see it in his eyes. The evil ran through him like blood ran through my veins. His huge thick hands reached out for me as I walked past him, yelling for Mom. She finally came walking out of the kitchen, drying her hands on a dish towel. Mom looked at Richie and I and said, “Trecia. Richie. I would like you to meet your new dad.” I couldn’t believe what she said. Sadly I looked up at her and said, “New dad. But I have a dad. He’s a good dad and he loves me.” Mom pushed me towards the strange man as she introduced me to Walter. Walter would become the ruler of my life. He would make all decisions from that day forward concerning my contact with my father, grandparents and anyone else carrying the McKnight name. He would also control everything else in my life, including my existence. Walter became my nightmare. He would destroy everything good in my life and the day would come when no one was permitted to even say my last name. Then on a winter night of February 1968 he made his first sexual attack. The next twelve years of my life would be under his complete control. His brutal attacks would come constantly with no recourse from my mother. His huge thick hand would sneak in to forcefully cover my mouth as I lay in bed at night; trying to sleep peacefully next to my sister, but quietly crying as I endured his sadistic games.” The evil of just one child’s nightmare….

Would not wish this battle of happiness on anyone……

 

Many times when we are left broken by the actions of those we love, we seem to get lost in the pain of it all. There are days when we wake with a huge weight of memories that challenge our ability to smile and keep on going.

“After all, isn’t this what the general society expects of us all? So what, you were beaten, bullied, molested, raped, threatened, controlled; who cares, RIGHT? They say things like; ‘Get on with life’ or ‘So what it’s only sex, you do it all the time. What’s the problem?”

Let me share with you what the ‘PROBLEM’ might be. How about if you close your eyes for about 5 minutes and pretend you are a child; remember the light spirit of catching fireflies in a jar. Then I would like for you to imagine your father (just using the pseudonym as an example); your father’s hands are touching you and suddenly through a quick flash of memory he is on top of you and you feel a burning pain rip through you like a red fury of fire. You hold your breath and turn your head. He’s grunting and telling you what a good child you are and how this is something that is supposed to be done.

All you can think of is how much it hurts!!! You want it to be over, you want him to quit. You have tried to tell your mom, but she simply turns away and ignores your words. You show your dysfunction brought on by the violation of it all; sometimes it comes out in rocked emotions other times through our reactions and actions as we go through life. You’re not allowed to share this ugly secret and you try to figure out why it makes you feel so worthless and ugly. You know that others won’t understand and your friends at school talk about sex like it is just something you do.

“Are they having sex with their parent too? Do they get beat up when the dishes aren’t clean, the laundry’s mess, or just because (HE) is drunk and angry? Do they feel like they don’t matter to anyone at all?”

As you grow up you carry all of this baggage with you. There can be many ‘PROBLEMS’ that you start to see. You may be falling in love with everyone or no one. You may look in the mirror and think about how disgusting you are, or that no one wants you, or no one ever treats you like a decent human being. You stress out easily at work because you have to make sure everything is done with perfection. Sometimes, if you are using an addiction such as alcohol, marijuana, or even food to help get through those shattering moments; you may have problems with being sober at work or high. You may sit at home all by your lonesome and drink or eat until you just can’t drink or eat any longer. You may try to be active in other things, such as taking care of your kids, your family, keeping up with friends, and believe it or not you may even find yourself clinging to your parents, or even the one who violated you. You feel like you need these connections because you want to be loved; to be wanted, appreciated for the good in you, but no matter how hard you try sometimes you just can’t make it through the day without a break down.

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Artwork via: Michal Madison Art

http://www.michalmadisonart.com

Each morning is a new challenge for you. When your eyes open you find yourself once again back in the circle of LIFE AFTER ABUSE!!! It’s ugly as hell and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone at all. It’s not nice to wake up without a smile for the one you love lying next to you. It’s not nice to be sad all the time and worried about how people will see you ‘Will they see past your veil of secrets?’

We all have some form of burden or trouble we carry sometimes, but the brutal acts and personally violating evils of these crimes is something so deep and so troublesome that even our therapists, support groups, family & friends have difficulty accepting our struggle, understanding the impacts of PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Doubt, Constant Fear of Rejection, the need for Perfection so intense that we don’t have time to enjoy those quiet times of sunshine and flowers or the belly laughter of our children.

We can only hope to help the survivors of these acts when we accept these abuses happened within our homes; the place where we should feel SAFE from the dangers of the world can often be the MOST DANGEROUS.

Remember there are many homes where one parent is not as dangerous as the other. Maybe that other parent doesn’t hear our silent screams for rescue, but maybe they don’t beat and hold you captive. Also there is the ugly truth that these processes of acceptance and silence move forward from one generation in our circle of life to another. Then these acts (CRIMINAL ACTS) are done by the person we marry, the person we choose to have as our lover, friend, companion; the person we share the intimacy with on a regular basis. We believe we can depend on this person to help us through, but instead (especially single moms who have been harmed as children) we continue to fall into the whirlwind romances and find ourselves living with what we have been taught is so ‘NORMAL’ to us. Something we know doesn’t happen in every household, but it definitely happens a lot and for some reason it seems to always happen to us. Those who live in misguided boundaries and beliefs all because of the daily, weekly, decades of brutality and degradation, personal violation and threat to our lives as our everyday perception of life.

You will find us then trying to cope with all of the horrific truths we carry.

How would you get through your day as a Survivor on the path to Freedom from Abuse?

© Patricia A. McKnight

Author/Advocate/Speaker/Talk Radio Prod & Host/Survivor

Founder; Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery & Talk Radio Programming

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery

Author: ‘My Justice’

Available through most online book resources!! Bookcvr1

 

The Maddening Silence!!

The Maddening Silence!!.

February Talk Radio Guest List and Schedule………..

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Talk Radio Programming

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery

Call in phone # (347)215-7754

Our programming is a magnificent team of survivors & experts, but each host represents their own specific show and will share with you their upcoming ideas, guests, and programs!! This schedule is for the Monday & Wednesday programs with Trish McKnight and Michal Madison. Be sure to tune in and listen as all of our hosts, including the wonderful Annie O’Sullivan & Kelly Behr, present their special programs for your listening. We do hope you will gather some food for thought as we discuss the very heinous acts of abuse and violence within our homes.

Each independent host will share their upcoming guests & programs!!

**We still would like to talk to some new hosts. We’ve got some open programming days and if you believe this is something you are interested in joining, please let us know. If you have a special focus on these issues and would like to share your talents in your own broadcasted program, please contact Trish McKnight by emailing:

butterflydreamsabuserecovery@gmail.com    Please title as  SHOW HOST in subject line!!

February Guest Schedule!!!!

Feb 04; Monday‘Generation No More’ w/ Trish McKnight & Guest

Ms. Janice Meadows – Hedrick: Very excited to have Janice join in as we continue looking at the studied stats for 2011 reported to the Children’s Bureau. We’ll kick off by talking about the stats in her area of West Virginia, along with some special information she’d like to share about her state and their efforts to prosecute the predators and parents who attack the children. We’ll also be chatting about the Teen Dating Violence awareness month!!! What can you do as a parent to see the warning signs and help your kids understand what they mean? Very proud to share Janice is our very first Premier Supporter for our radio programming. We truly appreciate her ongoing work and devotion to this cause!!

Feb 06; Wednesday‘Survivors World’ w/ Trish & Michal

Natasha Hagan: Natasha is an avid fighter and promoter for RAINN.org (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network). Miss Hagan is going to share her journey from victim to thriver as she is now one of the leading voices of this organization and manager of Team Strick. She’s traveled to Washington D.C., she’s met with some amazing stars and now she comes to share her ongoing journey as she speaks to break down the walls of silence about these vicious crimes.

Feb 11; Monday‘Generation No More’ w/ Trish & Guest

Nell Cole:  Advocate/Radio Producer & Host of Firetalk Productions blog talk radio program, Ms. Nell Cole will join in on a educational and awareness discussion about the crimes of abuse & violence throughout centuries.  Nell is an advocate for all injustice; not only speaking with those who have been harmed within our country, but she also discusses many various topics throughout history, such as: Sexual Healing, Orphans & Abuse, Historic topics of varying degrees. You’ll find her a wonderful, compassionate and highly intellectual person who sees these crimes and speaks the truth, breaking down the walls of secrets!!

Feb 13; Wednesday‘Survivors World’ w/ Trish & Michal

This night will be a call in night for our listeners to share your views on the topics of discussion. This broadcast will focus ‘Coping Strategies of the Trauma Survivor’. Michal did some research and found a few amazing articles about how survivors will use the coping they learned during the trauma of abuse throughout many of the difficult challenges in their adult life. Cannot wait to discuss and share with all of you on this topic!!! Please be sure to join us as we open up all the phones and our chatroom for your input.

Feb 18; Monday‘Generation No More’ w/ Trish & Guest

Denise Rotheimer: This is sure to me one powerful discussion. Mom, turned advocate, Founder of ‘Mothers on a Mission to Stop Violence’; Ms. Rotheimer is taking the battle of victims rights in the state of Illinois all the way to the U. S. Supreme Court. You’ll hear how her daughter was a child victim and how ‘Jasmine’s Law’ HB5187 also know as the Survivor Rights Act is the mission of this mom as she gains appellate justice for all victims and witnesses of violent crimes. Please listen in as this is sure to be one for the records as we discuss the foundation and her own personal battle in that very sensitive and often violated issue of Victims Rights vs. Rights of the Accused. Denise Rotheimer is also host of the cable television show, ‘Enforce Justice’.

Feb 20; Wednesday‘Survivors World’ w/ Trish & Michal

Janice Hedrick: Back on the show with us, this time Janice will be talking about her history of growing up in a drunken, raged filled home. Escaping and running into the hope of a new life, unfortunately to be attacked, raped and walking the path of the lost for almost 2 years. Janice is going to share with us the many secrets she has never spoken of before and we’ll discuss the impact of the sexual attack and how our mental health is impacted by the trauma. This is one for all rape survivors, you know the dark path of fear and loss that is felt. Please join in to support this courageous supporter/advocate to end the violence within our homes and the crimes of sexual attacks.

Feb 25; Monday‘Generation No More’ w/ Petra Luna of PlunaFoundation

Petra Luna: Singer/Musician/Artist/Advocate/Founder of Plunafoundation, the awesome and strong spoken spirit of Petra Luna comes to our phones. This amazing advocate is creator of MALE ABUSE AWARENESS WEEK!!! An event held December 1st – 8th in San Francisco, California, is dedicated strictly to MALE ABUSE AWARENESS!! Petra gives an exciting concert event and a week full of activities all directed to give our guys their macho male spirit and honoring what they have endured. Our male victims are becoming more recognized with the great efforts of Petra and her foundation to help guys understand, speak out and cope with the many difficult battles of being a survivor of rape and child abuse. You can join in the new Facebook Supporter Group by clicking on this link………. https://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_188508034535018#!/groups/188508034535018/

Feb 27; Wednesday – ‘Survivors World’ w/ Trish & Michal

Michal and I will open up our phone lines again and open up the topic of discussion as we take your shares about your journey of being a survivor. This show will focus on the issues of Domestic/Relationship Violence. There are many controlling factors when you speak of this type of violence. It can expand from the very least of keeping track of your actions, isolation, degradation, financial control, to the very brutal physical attacks which can often be almost deadly or life crippling. Join in as Michal and I take your calls and your stories about the survivors of these types of violence in our dating relationships and more common, those that happen within our homes by those who promise to be our partners, love us, respect us; in the end to torture and control us. We will close out our February month with a full discussion on the Relationship/Dating Violence our teens also deal with and how we can become aware to help them escape before the worst possible action happens.

Remember you were not brought into this world to have your spirit destroyed by the evil of those around you. There is life after abuse and you too can find your path to freedom!!

You deserve a safe place to sleep

You deserve respect

You deserve kindness & support

You deserve as much love as you freely give to others

You deserve roses in your garden of life!!

Thank you for supporting, sharing, and listening in on our programs. It’s sure to be a fantastic month with a lot of debate. Hope you will recommend the shows to your friends and family as we all step up to break down the wall of silence about these vicious crimes.

© Patricia A. McKnight

Founder/CEO: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery & Blog Talk Radio Programming

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio & Abuse Recovery

Author; ‘My Justice’ 

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com/home_tmp_6314.html

Advocate/Author/Speaker/Writer/Talk Radio Prod & Host/Survivor

Please email to: butterflydreamsabuserecovery@gmail.com

 

 

Hosts and Programs on Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio!!!!

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Blog Talk Radio

Hosts & Programming

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery

CALL IN TO TALK LIVE W/ OUR HOSTS

(347)215-7754

Join in our open chatroom discussions and be empowered with understanding of abuse and/or family/relationship violence!!!

We are a team dedicated to bringing you exciting upbeat conversations and fabulous guests, while we all learn to spread our wings. We all deserve the glory of freedom!!

Live Strong & Fly Free

 Annie O Ms. Annie O’Sullivan- You’ll be entertained with upbeat conversations, amazing guests and much more EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT @ 9pm e.s.t./8pm c.s.t./7pm m.s.t./6pm p.s.t Annie is bringing her show, titled after her incredible, page turning novel, ‘Can You Hear Me Now’ to our broadcasting team!!! You can catch her program of open discussions about childhood abuse & the trauma we must battle through. This show will surely grab your attention. Annie is an outstanding survivor who knows the broken path we can sometimes walk after a childhood filled with vicious evil. Join in to find out more and get to know the admirable spirit of the Advocate/Author/Speaker/Group Leader/Successful Career/Mother & Grandmother she is today. Be sure to visit Annie’s blog;  http://brokenuntilspoken.wordpress.com  Check out her story in the novel “Can You Hear Me Now?” – Click here to purchase your copy today!!!

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LIsaPromo Ms. Lisa Miller-BaldwinHer special broadcast will be EVERY THURSDAY NIGHT @ 9pm e.s.t./8pm c.s.t/7pm m.s.t./6pm p.s.t.!!!  Lisa comes to our team and is also new to the talk radio world. You will be amazed at her talent to both empower and inspire you. Lisa brings to you a show focused on all the issues surrounding the crimes of  Domestic/Relationship Violence. Her show ‘My Secret Place’ is about a safe place to talk about the pain and trauma; violation of personal safety, control and degradation that leaves victims having to rebuild who they are and some relocate without family and friends to escape the brutal acts. You will be empowered by her spirit and by the amazing work of this highly devoted Advocate & Founder; Wonderfully Made Foundation, which is dedicated to helping the homeless in our society learn the life skills and seek shelter to get their feet back on the ground. Please join in for her inspiring broadcast and ‘LIKE’ her organization page

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29578_454563851267646_510040939_n Ms. Michal Madison WEDNESDAY NIGHT @ 9pm est/ 8pm cst/ 7pm mst/ 6pm pst – A fabulous spirit and highly talented watercolor artist, Michal previously broadcasted the ‘Michal Madison Show’. She is now joining our team as she co-hosts with Trish on our Survivors World program!! Michal is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, who also followed the path of dysfunction as her adult relationships swirled into the rage of domestic violence for decades. This program is dedicated to all things survivors, both MALE & FEMALE!!! The broadcast is aimed at providing education, empowerment and encouragement as we share coping skills, life building skills, safety escape strategies and much more. You are invited to call in and share your special path as Michal and Trish open up the phone lines and the chatroom. Survivors World program is based from the original support group founded by Trish back in Nov. 2010 and it has been growing in bonds of friendship and support to help us all know we are not alone and someone will listen to your voice. Be sure to go to the homepage of Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery website and hit the ‘Sign In’ link to request your membership in this growing online support group. We welcome all survivors to our online group and we understand the road you have traveled!!! Check out Michal’s incredibly talented artwork by clicking here, be sure to ‘LIKE’ her page!!

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559283_341569465919905_320748185_n (240x185) Ms. Patricia ‘Trish’ McKnight – Monday evenings at 9pm est / 8pm cst/ 7pm mst/ 6pm pst; you are invited to join Trish for the broadcast of Generation No More’ a project created on Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery website where a forum page is opened to discuss how the behaviors and teachings of generations past have left their mark and are impacting the lives of our grandchildren today. On this program we discuss ALL things related to the abuses and violent behaviors that have not only been passed down and taught for centuries, but also how these traumas have effected our sense of personal safety and influenced the many dysfunctions of our mental health. You will be intrigued by conversations with special guests, advocates, organizations all geared to help end these acts of cruelty. On these broadcasts we bring a wide variety of topics and share from the forum on the main page for Generation No More. Trish is the author of her own true horror story of a life filled with 32 years trapped in the behaviors trained into her as a child, teen, and into her adult years. She has seen how these crimes and their emotional traumas have cycled forward into the lives of her children, which now impact the lives of her grandchildren.

Trish is dedicated to change what has stained her bloodline for decades and has built a website designed to help us all take a different look at these crimes and how they impact society today.  Advocate/Author/Speaker/Writer/Founder of Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery and our talk radio programming. Be sure to catch her with Michal Madison on Wednesday evenings as they host Survivors World’. You can find out more by visiting our website. Be sure to check out the highly praised and reviewed novel about Trish’s own true story of hell in the novel ‘My Justice’; available in paperback, e-book, Kindle & Nook, distributed by Authorhouse Publishing. Get the e-book format for just $2.99 by clicking on this hyperlink!!

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Remember you were not brought into this world to have your spirit destroyed by the evil of those around you. There is life after abuse and you too can find your path to freedom!!

You deserve a safe place to sleep

You deserve respect

You deserve kindness & support

You deserve as much love as you freely give to others

You deserve roses in your garden of life!!

Together we all learn to spread our wings, climb out of the darkness of our cocoons; soaring high as we – LIVE STRONG & FLY FREE!!

© copyright protected, January 21, 2013

Patricia A. McKnight

Advocate/Author/Speaker/Writer/Talk Radio Prod. & Host/Survivor

Founder/CEO: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

http://www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

Google+ – Twitter – LinkedIn – Pinterest – StumbleUpon

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery

http://www.survivorsjustice.com

 

The wounds you can’t see…..

There are many different truths of being a survivor of trauma that I’ve shared in the past two years. Almost everyday I try to share something positive to empower others like myself, to inspire hope for a new awakening to the truths of the damage inflicted by the acts and the darkest of mankind’s evil actions against another.

As many of you are aware also, I spent not only twelve years enduring the vicious attacks, both physical and sexual, from my stepfather; the endless rejection from my family, but also twenty years of repeated physical attacks from FIVE separate men. This isn’t to say that only men are the attackers, it’s just what I went through. (There are thousands of women who are very aggressive and who need the power over others).

So now I look at where I am today. I always talk about living in your present. For most survivors, this means we have to TAKE CONTROL OF OUR THOUGHTS. We have to concentrate and keep them from getting sucked into the past. I, and many like me, deal with this every moment of every day!!! Try it for awhile, it’s not an easy task and it takes time to become good at focusing your energy on staying in the positive. It’s difficult enough for anyone in today’s world, but for someone who has gone through years of brutal trauma; it’s truly much more difficult. Not something I would wish on any other being.

How do I see myself right now?

1) My life is in a very safe place.

2) It is well supported (for the most part anyway). I really don’t have family or friends from my past that are with me now. There are a few who have come from my hometown of Freeburg, a few who I went to school with and their parents know mine. It is not their fault of what happened to me. Its not their fault they didn’t say something or question. They were kids like me and it was a different time in our world. Kids didn’t speak against parents and no one talked about abuse or violence in the home. Sadly this is why we have so many of us who are survivors now. The cruelty of our parents came from the cruelty and discipline of their parents. We live what we know and patterns of acceptable behavior are formed. However, there were many adults who had both a responsibility to question and the authority to help rescue. For today though my friends both who have come into my life through Robbie, and those I have made in the virtual world of social networking; these are the people that stand by me now and accept all I am today. This is huge for me. Never before have I felt like I didn’t have to hide from anyone or hide the truth of who I am and what happened. This is my empowerment and the strand of hope that guides me through.

3) My physical health is a wreck; multiples of vertebral and spinal cord traumas. I suffer from Syringomyelia, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Obstructive Pulmanary Disease, the early stages of Atherosclerosis, Neuropathy in my hands and feet from the spinal cord damage, which caused severe burning, stinging, numbness in my fingers and toes and heels. I’m not wheelchair bound, but not far from it sometimes. There are instant migraines that can hit by simply turning my head to quick to look at something. There are many days that it’s difficult to even climb out of bed.

4) My mental health is a constant work in progress. Do I feel good about where I am today? Yes, but there are still the lasting effects from the attacks. I go through cycles of depression. Most days are pretty good, but then one morning I wake up and all I want to do is sleep it away. I get startled very easily. It freaks me out when my dog pants heavy. These days I don’t feel the need any longer to lock the bathroom door, at least most times when showering, but I still get sudden sensations of my stepfather sneaking outside the shower curtain. When I run a tub of water, I am reminded of having my head shoved under and the attempted (almost completed) drowning at 19. This happened a lot with the first of my chosen men. There are moments and memories of all the attacks that stay with me.

5) The relationships with my children are strained at best. Things happened that placed them in danger, by choices of both their father when he ran with them and me with my different abusive husband/boyfriends. Their stepfather was in my life for either years and only the first six months were pretty. There was one that struck my teen daughter and I ended up in jail for punching him in the face. There was another that threw my daughter into a closet door as he tossed her away when she was trying to defend me. There were constant days of walking on eggshells for them and worrying about if they were too loud, left their toys out, if they stomped around too much upstairs. They had dinners of waiting for the explosion or waiting for the drunk to come through the door. It was horrible for them, how can I expect us to have a healthy relationship? How can I expect them to have healthy relationships and view their life without memories, flashbacks, triggers, repeated patterns of behavior and more?

So why do I give so much of myself to staying in a positive light? I know that with my health, I’ll be lucky to have another FIVE good years. I know this reality and Robbie does as well. It’s alright, I don’t worry about the day of dying; I worry about what happens after I’m gone. Have I given all I can to try to help others learn the importance of being decent, helping to rescue and support those who live with this trauma? Is publishing my story and being an advocate with true passion enough to tell my children how sorry I am for all they had to go through? Will I really be able to build something from all of the bad that’s happened so that I can provide some type of change for the future? All the years of pain have to mean something, it cannot be just because that’s what happened. It cannot be that a soul can be so destroyed and controlled by so many different offenders and live for over THIRTY years accepting these attacks; believing that you deserved each and every single one, this cannot be my only existence in this world.

Moving into 2013 I have shared the new website, http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com I have also shared our radio show will be starting NEXT FRIDAY!!! On Jan 04, 2013 – I will be broadcasting our first show and the other hosts will be calling in to announce their programs. I’m really excited about bringing all of this to one focal point. The website, the Survivors World support group, Generation No More, it’s all coming together and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve spent the greater part of the past two years trying to decide how I really wanted to help. This provides all I was aiming at doing before the Good Lord takes me away.

Staying positive for me is absolutely necessary!!! I cannot maintain any other way. There is too much pain and dark memories that climb into my world as it is, there are too many moments of my wanted happy life that have been disrupted already. I can’t let the numerous abusers of my past take away what’s left of my life. I will not allow myself to wallow in what has been, but instead my drive and my focus is aimed at what I can try to change. In my heart and in my soul I believe there are thousands of women just like me; beaten down from a brutal life of accepting so many violent attacks. There are some still living in these types of relationships, there are others who are still living in the silent pain of what’s happened. There are millions of men who are also finally finding out it’s alright to say, ‘I Hurt’!!! We do hurt, and it sucks, but do not give in and let them win. Please take back the happy moments you deserve in this life. You are not born to be a target of others. You are not given life just so others can destroy it. Every living being has a purpose on this earth. There is life inside every heartbeat. How can we pretend that all of this means nothing?

Hopefully all of you who read this will find one strand of hope written within these truths. It’s not easy to be us, it sucks to be one who was so wrongfully abused and had an entire lifetime taken from them. How can we not try to seek out that star of ours? How can we allow someone to endure this dark pain alone? Friends, there is no other option but to keep moving forward and continue putting forth the effort to live happy!!!

May your new beginning that comes with the spirit of the New Year, 2013; be one that you grab onto and live it for all its worth. May you know unconditional love and feel the friendship of those who see your inside self and still accept who you are. May you build dreams and chase them, create them, design them, and allow them spirit to fly. I’ve given my project the name Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery because I want to help others climb out of the cocoon of their past, no matter what that past has attached. If you are unhappy in life, there is only one person who can change what is. Spread your beautiful wings and become all that you were born to be. Find the you that lives inside and wants to now have their turn. We can all find reasons and excuses why we don’t chase after better happier ways, but it shows great courage to climb out from under all the sadness and pain; picking up the puzzle pieces of your life and building, recreating, the beautiful spirit within.

Here’s to giving hope and love to your dreams come true!!! May you walk proud and with glory for all you’ve overcome.

Be magical, Be you Smile

© Patricia A. McKnight

Advocate/Author/Speaker/Writer/Radio Host/Survivor

Fndr/Pres: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

My Justice’ – This is not about any legal form of justice ever received or charged in my story. The justice is in finally finding my voice and the courage to talk about all that’s happened; the impact it left on me; the cycle that moved forward to my children.

May you find peace and justice in speaking about your truth!!!