In ‘the life’ – survive vs. suicide

As Human Trafficking Awareness Month comes to a close, I’d say there was a much larger presence of those focused on this issue and those others which can be the beginning steps to trafficking. I’d like to remind everyone that for those who have or are trying to survive the influence human trafficking has left on their sense of personal value and the survival behaviors learned while you are trapped.

Human beings, like other animals, adapt to their surroundings. Our inner most sense is that of survival itself. So let me ask this; ‘When you are so engulfed by constant explosive and almost deadly violence wouldn’t you become quite submissive to survive? How long do you think you could hang on? How bad would it be when you started praying for them to kill you and end your misery? You survive the best you possibly can, but if there is no sign of help or hope, you pray they kill you so you are free!!

This is the life you learn to endure and the behaviors of the human being will naturally adapt to keep you alive. Let me assure you; those who do survive rarely just walk the door of trafficking and live life like what is needed to adapt in ‘normal’ everyday neighborhoods. Without residential recovery services like those provided by Eden’s Glory & Grounds of Grace, among others; going from ‘The Life’ to a self sustaining life is usually filled with a path of addiction, mental illness, extreme emotional distress, lack on interpersonal skills, and a continued submissive behavior (despite how hard we try to cover that up). There is rarely any money available from the trafficker to pay for services needed to help their victims, so this burden lies on the shoulders of those who want to help. These are usually provided by nonprofit services who need funding from you and I; they are struggling for funding to help create more functional and self supporting individuals. The end result of their services will change the lives of these persons and the lives of their children and grandchildren.

When you are trapped in this way of life, you learn to live in a ‘Survive vs Suicide’ mode of thinking. The pain becomes so bad physically and emotionally that you pray they kill you just to put you out of your misery. You hope for a way out and if you run into the arms of another person, you are extremely lucky if that is a kind person who truly wants to keep you safe and learn how to live on your own. More common than not you end of up going straight to the arms of another abuser, usually a domestic relationship that starts off being really kind and your survival habits make you more tolerable of acts of control or degrading remarks. These are dismissed and before you know it, one day they take a swing. The first strike is always the most difficult one, so the second will be much easier and more aggressive. This will take over your relationship and become your existence at least two or three times a week. Your holidays will be taken over by the threat or possibility of violence. You will rarely defend yourself and even less likely to leave because of those few good moments you share. You tell yourself, ‘He does love me. He is good to me most of the time. He just gets angry. If I don’t do this, or I stop doing that, he will stop hitting me. Just so long as he doesn’t leave me alone, doesn’t kick me out, doesn’t cheat on me, doesn’t hurt my kids. This is the way of life for those who have been so violently and violated in the life of trafficking.

How is a person who has grown up in this type of threatening environment and distorted behaviors supposed to choose the right relationships or live a stable everyday life? How are they supposed to learn to associate in common social and professional environments? If we do not ensure funding for shelters and rebuilding services for young and old, victims of family violence, sexual harm, and trafficking, then we cannot just expect them to be self sufficient and become a member of the family, become a parent or a teacher, become a police officer or a social services caseworker without some turmoil and dysfunctional behavior.

Now believe me it is possible for those who have gone through this tragic way of life, especially as children or teens, and then become a parent without any support or family around to help them. We learn to isolate ourselves out of the heavy shame and disgust we carry for our past. We can’t just open our mouths and say; ‘I was forced to have sex with a lot of men from a very young age’. Do you have any idea the level of courage it takes to say these words? If it had happened to you, could you just sit down to dinner and say this to a mother in-law, or an uncle? Could you go see your priest one time and tell him these words? Could you go to a stranger, a doctor, or an employer trying to explain why you’re ill all the time or having so much trouble?

This is why it’s important for survivors of these types of traumatic events seek help. It’s why it’s important to find your voice and help others find their own light. It’s why we need the services of Violence Prevention Center, Hoyleton Youth & Family, DHS, SAVE, Call for Help, PAVE, The Women’s Center, RAINN, ChildHelp, NAASCA, and other leading local and national organizations. All of them continue to put their hearts into the mission of saving lives and rebuilding lives, healing generations every single day. I’m very proud today to say that now we also have Butterfly Dreams Alliance, an incredible team who have joined me in creating a prevention and rebuilding nonprofit service for families & professional education in Southern Illinois.

Today my life has come full circle. I am no longer trapped and praying for death. I am no longer contemplating survive vs suicide. I am 55 years old, I am in the best relationship of my life. I have three beautiful grown amazing children. I have three amazing grandchildren. I have made hundreds of inspiring and supportive friends across the country. We have fought to update and change policies & statutes together. We are creating more known knowledge about the human mind and the human heart in every survivor we encourage along the way.

Today my life is truly free and I am so thankful that I did not miss the dance it has given me. Please help those services in your area and across the country!!!

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We all need inspiration…..

Sharing this Beautiful power of HOPE!!!

Today I will do my best. If I have a good day, I will be proud of myself. If I have a bad day, I will not dwell on it. I will forgive myself, I will put it behind me and I will continue to move forward.

Written by Inspirational Quotes on January 9, 2016. Posted in Attitude Quotes, Happiness Quotes, Inspiring Quotes, Life Lessons, Life Quotes, Motivational Quotes,Positive Quotes, Quotes, Self Improvement Quotes, Self Motivation Quotes, Self Respect Quotes

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Today I will do my best. If I have a good day, I will be proud of myself. If I have a bad day, I will not dwell on it. I will forgive myself, I will put it behind me and I will continue to move forward.

 

I’ve been so out of touch again. Is it the holidays? Is it the family chaos? Is it the physical chronic pain? Is it because I am trying to find guidance in what I NEED to do next? How do we make our life happen in some good fashion of function and survival? There is what I CAN do, and then what I CANNOT? Remember the prayer of ‘God grant me the strength, the courage, and the knowledge’; this is what we can only hope to feel inside ourselves each day.

If we hang onto HOPE or FAITH, whichever higher power or Creator you believe is guiding our life; this belief gives us guidance. It kind of keeps us going so that we never give up, that we never stop trying in OUR LIFE to get it right. We have two choices each morning, one is to figure out what we need in order to get through to the next step tomorrow, or we can give up and live with nothing inside us but pain and sadness. Living with the deep WAIT for someone else to come along and fix things for us; however, no one can do for us. You only become completely dependent on that person to provide food, water, money, cigarettes, drugs, alcohol, or whatever become the crutch we use to bury the sadness and the ‘should have done that’ thoughts.

I honestly have learned to live with a plan to survive each day; even now when I’m not at my best, but I still try to reach for something ALMOST everyday. In my heart I wish I could learn to live in the moment, but it seems there is so much chaos that keeps popping up and this makes it quite a challenge to be light, positive, strong, to keep believing, to keep reaching. This is where we all have to learn our own way, and walk our own choices. There comes a time in EVERY PERSON’S LIFE, when we have to say: ‘Now it is my bad choices that have brought me to where I am, so something inside ME must change. I will not always have someone else in my life to make sure that I’m warm, that I’m fed, that I’m held tight in comfort; always depending on someone else to FIX my mess again.

TODAY AND TOMORROW – I MUST SURVIVE.

Let go of the past sorrow, at least enough to allow some light to come forward in tomorrow. We cannot sit with blame, but only commit to ourselves that regardless of where we must start today; my choices are mine and the road goes two different ways; today is a new start and yesterday is gone; HOPE, FAITH, STRENGTH, COURAGE, BELIEF – this is what we must see in the mirror as we take our life’s lived knowledge so far to set out our choices each day. At some point it is our own responsibility to survive & to figure out the puzzle of our beginning mess to put things back and FIX IT ourselves. LIVE!! Never ever give up!!!

Ready, Set, Wide Awakes of our American Society

ATTENTION PLEASE!!!  YOU CAN HELP MAKE CHANGE HAPPEN

REVIEW, SIGN, SHARE, GET YOUR POLITICAL LEADERS INVOLVED  

Working to end the teaching of silence, community & societal tolerance, levels of disregard of the ongoing extreme harm which exists in the dangerous environment

‘Family Crimes and Terroristic Abuse’ – Trecia’s Law 

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*** Photo taken at ‘Lincoln Memorial Library’ Springfield, IL – 03/20/2015

On this link you will find an ongoing active petition through Change.org; https://www.change.org/p/let-s-make-all-sexually-related-acts-against-a-minor-a-federal-offense-and-allow-a-three-step-review-of-all-child-maltreatment-reports

We have this active petition to request our politicians across the country help us update old laws, procedures, and victims services directives. We need to ensure our provisions are doing the absolute very best for all persons, especially our children. In our American Society we must strive to do our very best to protect the RIGHT TO BE SAFE, especially when the danger is within our home. It is the duty of our laws & policies to intervene when there is repeated extreme cruelty possibly being committed in grievous damaging manners against our children; crimes against those who cannot fight back, are easy to manipulate, and can be forced through extreme actions or threats to permit sexual interactions, even the use of illicit drugs or alcohol during the attacks/manipulations/exploitations.

   UGLY TOPIC – ABSOLUTELY

DO THESE TYPES OF ACTIONS EXIST IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD –

NATIONAL ESTIMATE – 1 in 4 homes

There are many federal & national health organizations which have studied the impact of the ongoing years of these types of heinous actions and behavioral teachings. There are many certain lifelong impacts validated by the modern day life challenges in family, relationships, self loathing & self destruction, which millions of survivors speaking out or privately seeking assistance today have dealt with, without hope for intervention; some surviving the worst for decades of ongoing threats and believed sense of certain harm. These survivors endured years of repeated sexual or physical grievous harms, many others forced to allow sexual interactions with other adult persons or neighborhood members outside of the family relationships, traded or forced to take part in sex trafficking circles.

In our modern society we try teaching our children about the bonds of various types of family connected by compassion, love, and positive guidance; we teach children about tolerance of others freedoms but do not educate about their direct personal rights to be safe. How many children do you know who are educated and understand they have legal protective rights to defend from those most horrific abuses which tragically most often begin within the barriers of our home; committed against persons unable to protect themselves, committed in the heavy silent circle of generationally taught acceptance and tolerance of these harmful actions within our human society.

Please we can no longer force these victims into shame, blame and protect their family abusers.

We request grievous threatening violence or sexual crimes against children between the ages of 0 – 15 to be prosecuted through One Federal Policy, with forfeiture of any and all assets to provide victims recovery services, life skills development, family & parenting education, along with self sufficient rebuilding platform!! –

Read the exact TEN BULLET POINT MEASURES, sign your name, pass it on to a friend, help us unite to gain media attention and force our nation’s leaders to listen to us NOW!!!

It is time to review/implement/update our existing policies to ensure we are assisting when the worst of these offenses are committed by a parent or family member who has complete access and control over victims actions, behaviors, and existence. We are requesting a review and/or implementation of protections beginning for persons born on or after January 01, 1984. It is crucial in today’s prosecutions & policies to mandate the protections of our children from those persons within their home who repeatedly commit aggressive harmful actions and repeated human behaviors of violent threats which have been accepted throughout generations and centuries of our human existence.

 ‘WIDE AWAKE’; Strong American Society

Against Acceptance & Silence of

Family Crimes and Terroristic Abuse

https://www.change.org/p/let-s-make-all-sexually-related-acts-against-a-minor-a-federal-offense-and-allow-a-three-step-review-of-all-child-maltreatment-reports

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‘Wide Awakes’ was a verbal reference by a group of men at a pub late night who heard the ramblings of a rally to elect Republican Abraham Lincoln for President of the United States of America.

His policy – ‘All human beings to be seen equal under the eyes of the law and provided with those same protected rights throughout the nation’

Thank you for your time. If you would like to know more about specific research and publications from Centers for Disease and Control, National Institute of Mental Health, National Institute of Health, National Child Traumatic Stress Network; send any and all contact or media requests to trish.mcknight@live.com

 

Best regards,

Trish McKnight, Dana Pfeiffer, Lisa Chilton

Copyright of Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery from Sept 2012 – 2017

www.vpcswi.org

www.groundofgrace.org

www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

Will we just keep counting the bodies……..

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http://www.clipsyndicate.com/video/play/5717473

Interview courtesy of: WCIAtv, reporter Jessica Kunz

This is a fabulous interview and friends I am extremely grateful for the past few months of interviews I’ve been blessed to take part in; this one by Jessica and two others with Investigative Reporter, Eric Steltzer WANDtv.com (links for these two interviews listed below). My concern however; can someone possibly explain to me why we would rather just keep counting the bodies of the millions of children harmed everyday by family sex trafficking or family terroristic abuse and torment; keep counting the lives of millions destroyed by these acts every year rather than addressing the issue head-on?

Dammit I’m FURIOUS!!! I’ve handled just about all of the authoritative rejection I can possibly deal with on this issue. These past 5 years have been spent channeling as much energy as possible in providing education, awareness, activism, and advocating for the individual basic right to be safe, especially for our children. Many other outstanding advocates have either teamed up with me personally, or have done their own exhaustive advocating on the very serious pandemic numbers which continue to climb above 3.5 million every year, and those are just the numbers of child maltreatment reports. However, because of the mandates, which are not updated to address the hidden trauma behind the family terroristic nature of the abuse to force a child to remain silent and simply endure whatever it is their parent continues to dish out on them day after day, year after year, until they are old enough to get away or they end up self destructing. Sadly many thousands of these wounded souls commit suicide every year, because the trauma is just too severe to overcome and the heavy burden of shame and silence refuses to be addressed by those in our community and our politicians who have the power to create the changes needed to save their lives.

Yes, I’ve used my own personal story, but I don’t feel its my right to discuss someone else’s history. Also the nature of my very public and well known family sex trafficking, exploitation, terrorized slavery, and disfiguring neglect is really one of the most extreme cases I’m aware of, as is with a few other survivors, but none to the public knowledge that mine exceeded in our small rural community.  However, rest assured my goal is NOT for personal gain, but rather to create one of the strongest untied stands across the country in our human history to ensure that these crimes STOP NOW!!

I’ve been shut down by the Illinois Dept of Public Health, stating my story was too graphic and although April’s conference in Peoria was for the qualified trained professionals on Women’s Health and Family Wellness; I was told I needed to tune back my story and reduce the graphic nature of those 30+ years in hell. They had professionals declining to attend my presentation because it was just more than they could possibly handle. Do they realize that children are still suffering in these tragedies everyday? Do they realize that if they do not face it and discuss it, they will NEVER get a child to discuss it with them? Do they realize that by refusing to listen for one hour as I talk about the actions of Family Crimes and the extreme trauma involved when the acts have been committed with complete malice, in a form of terroristic nature, for the sole purpose of silencing the child and preventing them from ever feeling safe enough to talk about these ugly secrets, thus preventing any criminal charges against the parents who commit and allow these grievous acts? Do they realize the continue teaching of shame, rejection, and of course, SECRET KEEPING they enforce when they as trained healthcare professionals cannot handle listening to a one hour presentation which will help them spot and treat, assess and assist a victim of any age trapped in these vicious attacks?

Last October, I teamed up with a personal friend and the Legal Advocacy Director for Violence Prevention Center of Southwestern Illinois. I had been working on a proposal to address the very serious crimes within our family unit and the terroristic nature in which they were constantly kept secret and silent. Lisa Chilton and I took the proposal to Illinois House Representative Jay Hoffman, then to Illinois States Attorney Brendan Kelly, and in late February I was notified that ‘terroristic’ was not the proper or acceptable word to use, and out of ten guidelines in the proposal they were ready to introduce a measure to change the Statute of Limitations for a barrage of criminal sexual offenses against a child, including involuntary sexual servitude. The measure House Bill #3242 was going to change our S.O.L. from 1 year after victims 18th birthday, to 20 years, which would allow the victims time to first escape the parental control and then go through the very long and grieving process of accepting what had actually happened, then they could bring forth criminal charges by the time they were 38 years old. However, when I emailed Representative Hoffman last week about a date they would be introducing this bill, I received what seemed to me, a proper political email; “I regret to inform you we had other bills processed and decided not to address this issue at this time, but rest assured I am determined to stand behind your cause.” I really do not mean to offend Representative Hoffman, IL Dept of Public Health, or any other of our legislators or our state and national resources, but I certainly would like to ask, ‘When will the body count be serious enough for our systems to finally take a very public stand and address what changes need to be implemented to ensure we are doing our very best; not only protect the individual rights of our children, all victims to be safe, but also update our public policy on how we assess, assist, and investigate every report of maltreatment made across the country?’

There is another person whom I’ve partnered with, Dana Pfeiffer, Director of Grounds of Grace a nonprofit resource assisting victims of human trafficking, terroristic abuse, and other related family crimes around Central Illinois, including our State Capital of Springfield where the amazing President Lincoln began his strongest political campaign, which later led to the equal rights to FREEDOM for all persons. The Emancipation Proclamation granting freedom for all persons to be seen equal in the eyes of our laws, without regard to race, religion, gender, and age. These are our basic Human & Civil Rights, written into law by our United Nations General Assembly in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, and our own American Constitution; in fact it is the basic freedoms our country was founded on but yet we still can’t truly stand up for those rights, especially when it comes to our children and the desperate destruction happening within our families every single day.

Dana Pfeiffer and I have teamed up in speaking engagements as I present my history and what I advocate for today, she is right by my side validating the serious crimes she helps victims escape committed by their family, most commonly their parents. The numbers she assists continues to climb, victims as young as 2 years old to 68 years old. When I address people in authority, or in any setting, about the serious nature of my case, it is not for your pity. I don’t need your pity and absolutely DO NOT WANT YOUR PITY. I’ve survived and my life is very good today. I am safe, I am loved, and if my children and grandchildren weren’t still dealing with the emotional staining from those acts that distorted and destroyed the safe path in my life; my life today would actually be quite perfect.

However, what I do hope those who hear my story, or read ‘My Justice’, will take from all of the extreme vicious and very public nature of exploitation, sex trafficking, terrorized slavery, and the disfiguring neglect of all basic human needs; I WANT YOUR ACTION. We need to ensure not another single person is abandoned and judged as I was throughout the six consecutive years of family friends, school teachers, neighbors, adult men and boys who got their own special time with the child, the law enforcement who knew me well and didn’t care at all that my skin was rotting and filth covered because I could not even safely bathe in my home. Every person in Freeburg, Illinois knew my family, knew my mother;‘POOR WOMAN, having to deal with such a horrible man’.

Guess what towns people, she didn’t deal with him at all, cause he was like a comforting blanket who kissed the ground she walked on. He would have done anything for her, and he did leave my brother and sister alone, but me; I was his target. I was his to do with as he pleased, she not only sacrificed me for him to do with as he pleased, but she also abandoned all basic human needs, ordered me to care for, cook for, and provide for the family needs, she purchased him a little brass bell that only I was expected to answer to at all times. The citizens of Freeburg either witnessed, took part in, or saw the very public destruction of a young growing girl and tagged her as the ‘Village Whore’, rather than try to help her. When I reached out today asking those in public office, those in media who have the ability to share this story, those who fight for protective rights and those in every small community; still all I have felt is that same sense of disregard I lived with all my life. No one cared when it was my parents. No one reported the many years of almost murderous attacks and beatings in my relationships and marriages. Neighbors, police, and healthcare all dismissed the horrific nature of my daily life and figured I didn’t deserve their help then, and apparently the continuing climbing numbers of those speaking about these past decades in hell, they are all getting those same closed doors as I am today.

When I write, do interviews, or even the creation of our petition addressing Family Crimes and Terroristic Abuse (link below for you to sign now), what I want, what all of the hundreds of survivors hope to achieve in sharing our voices today; we want to inspire every healthcare worker, every educator, every community member to notice the warning signs of the desperate victims and rather than abandon them and judge them for the disgusting behavior or promiscuous nature of their acts, HELP THEM!! Maybe you’ll be the one to rescue them; to give them a chance to heal their wounds, learn the positive behaviors and become better parents for their children. It’s easy to look at a family or a person, pass our taught nature of judgment and then turn away and do nothing, but it takes great courage to say that every life matters and EVERY CHILD DESERVES TO BE SAFE!!!

I don’t understand why, throughout our entire human existence, the authorities who have the power to do something simply disregard the serious body count related to suicide, murder, and self destruction from these vicious and disgusting acts, especially when committed against a helpless child who cannot fight back, cannot run away; they can only endure in silent tears the shameful brutal crimes committed against them by their parents and family. I really do not understand why we do not step up and scream out; ‘THAT’S IT, THIS IS NOT THAT CHILD’S CRIME AND SHOULD NOT BE THAT CHILD’S BLAME’!!

How many more centuries will people have to endure these types of attacks within their homes, by their parents or their partners, then walk away filled with pain and terror, while the offenders are protected by the forced ugly secrets of torture and trafficking, or they walk away with a slap on the wrist rather than the harshest punishments deserving of their actions? It is their choice to attack and terrorize, especially when they are attacking and forcing a child into dark secrets and a life filled with destructive behaviors and continued shame in the feeling of not being worth saving. We have hundreds of documented studies which reveal how a life in traumatic events and vile attacks impacts the lives of individuals. We have studies confirming the frontal lobe brain development impaired and twisted by the repeated years trying to survive and making daily decisions based on what they need to do in order to just survive that day. We have the National Child Traumatic Stress Network, the Centers for Disease and Control, National Domestic Violence Hotline, Prevent Child Abuse America and many other outstanding organizations which hold rallies, they help victims recover and rebuild their lives; yet we cannot get a public policy legislator to truly address and make it their public platform to face the very serious pandemic numbers which continue to soar above three million reports every single year. I’m tired of counting the bodies, I’m disheartened by the lack of public concern and the constant avoidance of the direct issues. Constantly I pray that someday all that happened to me, and many other millions like me, will one day matter to those who have the power to mandate our laws and protect the very precious right to simply BE SAFE!! The rights to be free; free from harm and free from fear. One day we will protect the rights of every human being to be safe, no matter who is harming them. What worries me most, is how many lives will it cost us before we actually begin implementing the changes needed to ensure we are doing the very best for our children’s future tomorrow.

Let’s stop counting the bodies and do something about the crimes!!

Thanks for reading, perhaps you’ll also sign our petition here —- https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-please-enforce-the-right-to-be-safe-for-all-persons-especially-our-children-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

I’d like to thank Investigative Reporter Eric Steltzer with WANDtv.com for the fabulous interviews and share those links with readers here…..Courtesy of WANDTV.com

1) http://www.wandtv.com/category/182814/video?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=11396570

2) http://www.wandtv.com/category/182814/video?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=11166176

In closing, Ms. Dana Pfeiffer & Ms. Lisa Chilton, thank you both my friends for your ongoing support and your courage to continue rescuing and assisting all the victims who come into your path. You are both angels and we need your efforts in helping to encourage our society that now is the time to create the greatest change for our human society and protect all persons before something horrific enters their life to destroy the special magic of their spirit within. I’d like to thank Ms Linda Walcher, Kristen Eng, Amie Loman, and Exec Director Darlene Jones of the Violence Prevention Center of SW IL, Mr. Donn Willeford of Hoyleton Ministries, Michal Madison, Mary Graziano, Kelly Townsend, Julia De’Alfanzo, Tammy Fox, Bill Murray, Petra Luna and many hundreds of other amazing advocates who continue to fight the good fight and support victims, survivors, and families touched by the horrible cycle of these crimes. Together we can all make a huge difference, and remember by making the choice today to protect just one person in your life’s circle, to be a positive influence in their lives; you hold the power to change their life’s path, eventually protecting their children and their grandchildren from all the suffering which impacts that victim today.

Blessings & thank you readers,

Patricia A McKnight

Author; ‘My Justice’

Fndr: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Steps to Recovery –Daily Rebuilding Skills

Family Crimes & Terroristic Abuse Training Program

Contact me today for your next eventtrish.mcknight@live.com

www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

Go ahead, ask that child what happened, I dare ya?

 

Well its happened my friends. Yesterday myself and a very dear friend, a passionate advocate for the voices of those who’ve been harmed; Ms. Lisa Chilton, Legal Advocacy Director of St. Clair County Courthouse; we met with Illinois House Representative Jay Hoffman, and we introduced the proposal for the Family Terrorist Act – ‘Trecia’s Law’. (let me add here that Representative Hoffman’s career in establishing civil and just amendments to help our nation is remarkable, I am so truly honored to have been given his time and he did not rush me out Smile)

Google this – https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-help-your-american-society-protect-our-universal-declaration-of-human-rights-please-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

Friends I cannot share the depth of passion I felt in my heart as I spoke with Mr. Hoffman. I was so nervous my hands were shaking. In my inner self I needed him to hear what I was saying; how much we needed to take time and address these issues. It is so horrifying to me that in our human society we still continue to turn silent about the one thing that matters most for OUR entire existence as human beings, alive and breathing. Tell me why are we afraid to ask the children we know, “What happened sweetie?’.

“Why didn’t you get your homework done these past three months? Why do you keep going out with every guy that comes your way? Why are you afraid of your dad coming home?”

You know, four years ago all I wanted to do was just tell my own story and get it out of my gut. I had been forced, then manipulated, then tricked into silence about all the many different levels and types of harm I had suffered over some 30+ years. It was tearing me apart that my life was a whirlwind cycle of emotions, reactions, and explosions which had almost destroyed my own children. My choice to leave their father after our 2nd marriage together in trying to keep our family together, my choice in how I played out that choice caused a beginning of pain for my children that I have carried so extremely heavy in my heart and still today, now 15 years from leaving my last violent attacker, it is the greatest regret I have but I guess in some ways they were being guided in a more appropriate life pattern than I may have given. It shows in my daughters’’ lives through the choices in men they take and the type of life I see them living. This is not what I wanted for MY BABIES. This is not why I begged God to give me that one true gift. Please they may have destroyed my physical body, but please do not take away that one true miracle, the miracle of children.

My goodness how precious a gift to have a child, but also what a heavy responsibility, especially when you have never had any safe or positive form of parenting yourself. How in the world can we possibly guide them through and protect them when so many of us have been infected with this disgust and distortion of what life is SUPPOSED to be. Now I know its not guaranteed to be perfect and become rich, or any other form of happiness, but dammit it must be protected and it must be SAFE!!! If a child cannot lay down their head in a quiet, SAFE PLACE then what are we about and what have we become as human beings?

Trust me, I know how mixed up and confused it is, especially when we have been blocked by the enforced silence that has built our entire lives. How bad is it that a person, any person, will live into their 40’s before they ever even think about telling a DOCTOR about what’s happened? We say to them all our lives, for those who ever had a choice to go to a doctor, we tell them they fell and hit their head, I tripped, fell off my bike, ran into a door, and what is even worse than this; the doctor’s still are too uncomfortable to ask that one true question that can begin to change their entire lives, ‘What happened sweetie; truly you can tell me.’ 

What is wrong with our teachings about life when we look away from our own children being molested silently by someone. Ok, so we don’t actually see the molestation go on, but we do see changes in that child. We see behaviors in our family functions together that show how that child is evolving under that haunting thought of why so many people don’t see what’s happening and if they do why don’t they ask, ‘What happened sweetie, you alright, something going on inside you need to talk about? Is there a secret thing that someone is telling you not to tell. What is it child, what happened?

Friends, we cannot play these games with our society any longer. Please take a look around you, where has it gotten us that we just can’t be faced with that child’s voice telling us something we don’t know how to handle. What’s worse is that you are the adult and you don’t know how to begin because you’ve never spoken about things that happened to you. You know that forced silenced, you know that feeling of not being able to EVER talk about what happened. You’re 35 years old and have never faced a single moment of what happened but you’re all confused in life. You don’t know your way through, you’re just trying to make it the best possible way you can. You have you’re mouth to feed, clothe, shelter, and maybe you even need family to help you out. How in the world can you every ask that child what’s happened?

When I published ‘My Justice’ it was about finding my way through. I was in a relationship I didn’t want to somehow screw up. I was in a good job and my children were growing up, my son had started college. I could not figure out why in the world when something was good in my life, for the very first time it was relaxed and SAFE. No one was touching me when I didn’t want to be touched. No one was grabbing my throat while I slept and trapping me in a fear of possible death if I didn’t do whatever it was they needed or wanted me to do at that moment. My life was fabulous and my insides were going crazy, especially as I was writing and in my own therapy, since I had been forced by my many medical issues onto disability; I started writing to my children and I needed to explain it all to them so that maybe it would somehow change things. I prayed with all my soul that somehow it would change what happened in the lives of my grandchildren, even if its not the life of perfection that it at least be SAFE, CALM, SUPPORTIVE. God heard my prayers with every word I’ve ever written, including this one. He’s hid with me and all those times I ran to the cemetery and begged Him to just take me out, He kept me going.

No I am not a church going religious person, in fact I’m terrified inside a church only because my stepfather ensured me through every single breath he took that I was never good enough to be accepted into Heaven, that I would surely be condemned for absolutely everything I’d ever done after age 12, which by the way is when his greatest level of torture ever began; the year he took my virginity with the barrel of his favorite shotgun and ripped me apart. Hoping that I would never be able to get pregnant and reproduce, enforcing his reign of control and making sure that I never took a chance to tell another living soul about what happened in our house and how he and my mother used me on so many levels of either seduction or physical labor. He made sure I never spoke against another person who ever touched me again in my life. He made sure that I felt like I didn’t deserve to breathe so why should anyone ever give a damn about what was happening to me. What’s even worse is that throughout all the physical rot that ate away my skin, took away my smile with the layers of plaque that had been there for years because I didn’t deserve a toothbrush. I didn’t deserve to see a doctor about the infection of pus filled sores whom so many many people avoided touching me at all for a decade. How much more public than taking that disgusting rotting child to the bar and teaching her how to shake her ass so her old man could have some free beers?How much more public than knowing in your circle of co-workers that Malcolm had a young daughter he liked to bring around to all the parties and shit. You could even pay in on a half barrel plus to come to the house. No you didn’t have to worry about Mona, she’d go to the bedroom and watch TV. Think she was kind of jealous that I wanted to have ‘Trecia Ann’ host the parties, sit on their laps, dance around with them and yeah, you’d better damn well shut the hell up when they start touching you girl, it’s nothing dammit’

That was the very honest truth of my life friends for nine consecutive long years. I went to the same school day after day from fifth grade to the middle of my sophomore year, which is when everything was at its very most evil and it just kept getting more dark every day. This was the life of a child whom not a single soul in that entire community who knew and talked about all that child did, but not a single person felt I deserved being asked,

‘What happened sweetie?’

How much longer will we do this people? How many more children and teens will we ignore when we know for a fact something’s going on in their lives? No it may not be as dark as the life myself and already at least 300 others I know have lived, but what if it is? Are you willing to take the chance that it won’t be that bad?

So darlins, its’ like this; Representative Jay Hoffman is definitely passionate about changing the path of histories like our generation have suffered, exactly like so many others before us. It has been a cycle of human destruction since back in the Roman days and further. We have seen human slavery at its very worst and we fought the battle that lost the greatest number of human beings in any war as 50,000 men lay dead on the ground in the bloodiest battle ever fought in our country, the right for every single human beings right to be protected in their person. We fought battle after battle and spent billions upon billions of dollars helping rebuild other countries who have been destroyed for not protecting and respecting human life & protective rights. Yet in all of those battles friends, we still cannot look at the precious little child that sitting next to us on Christmas and say to her, ‘What’s happened sweetie, you alright?’

Now I know when I found Facebook and started a little thing called talking, at first it was to let Y’all know ‘My Justice’ was being published and then it started as much more; writing to everyone then became a source for my therapy, which I still need on some levels. You caught my voice and many of you then started in PM’s with me. You were sharing you stories and what happened, as you also needed finally to tell someone. You needed to scream and you needed to have someone hear your voice say, Dammit Listen to Me!! We started a little group together, we started many wonderful two years of talk radio broadcast’s together and we’ve written and posted, commented and connected. I see all of you there who couldn’t or didn’t quite yet feel strong enough to tell the stories and share that broken, wounded soul; you are now amazing group leaders, strong advocates, and we have all developed in astounding ways together. It’s been an amazing journey my loves and I am so grateful that you’ve been their for me and I pray that I’ve been their for you. This is how we connect together and we change the future for our kids in our own special little way. We share through the internet and all the way around the world just how many injustices there are in our human society, and you know what; many have become devoted and strong in this mission, but others a few, they’ve become more focused on the fame of being the one than being able to be the one that make a true change, starting with your very own family and circle of friends. That’s how we make the greatest change my friends, we become strong enough to ask that child what happened.

Now my dears, is the part where I go back to praying. The next step Lisa is seeing if she can arrange a meeting with the Illinois State’s Attorney, Brendon Kelly to see how his office can help better address or even if its worth it, to create mandates to implement action on the Family Terrorist Act – ‘Trecia’s Law’. Representative Jay Hoffman was very open to conversation, supportive and listening to the needs I wanted to make sure we address in healthcare, education, and most importantly all three of us agreed on – empower and teach our children that it’s alright to tell someone about the secrets someone is forcing you to keep. It doesn’t matter if its Mom, Dad, Step Parents, Boyfriends or Girlfriends, even the kid next door. You have the HUMAN RIGHT TO BE PROTECTED IN YOUR PERSON!!! Not one single person has the right to even put a finger on you in a sexual or harming manner. You have the right to always be safe!!!! This should be strongest in our great country of America than anywhere else in the world. It’s what our country was founded for, so that no matter who you are you had the right to live &* breathe in being just who you were born to be, and that you do NOT have the right to lay a harmful finger on any other person. You are not better than or more deserving than that person next door or down the street. You may be more powerful than that child, but so what. How strong do you have to be to never lay a harmful finger on a three week old baby, or a six year old child, or a twenty year old mother, or a thirty year old man. Not one person isn’t given the protection of their person, because the United Nation’s Global Committee have written in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

This Christmas Eve is so important to me. In a spiritual manner I am praying stronger than I’ve ever prayed before, and being more open in spirit than I’ve been since first finding my courage to speak up, tell my secrets, tell My Justice. This amendment we are asking our American Governing Person’s to review is how we can begin change in our own communities, within our own neighborhoods, and especially within our own families and ask that child, ‘What happened sweetie?’

So in my spiritual self I pray to God in Heaven above, if there is a way we can give back the importance of love and protection in our human society, please this is your chance to help us God, help us be strong enough and knowledgeable enough to teach our children that it is wrong for these harms to come to them. Teach them that if it is hurting them it should never ever be a secret, no matter if its actually them who is being hurt or if a friend at school or cousin Jimmy said something or did something that made them uncomfortable. Our Creator did not say that we are just born to procreate, but born to love each other in a spiritual respect of who we are as people. We cannot and should not ever allow the destruction of a human being on any level, but I promise you friends, if a child or a person is living with someone who is indeed their ‘Family Terrorist’ you WILL see the signs of change and trauma on that precious soul, no matter how old or young, we cannot ignore the dangers of those within our neighbors home any longer. See something, Say something – you have the adult duty to never turn away from the knowledge within your gut that something is most definitely wrong. You have the duty to your friend, your neighbor, even your own grandchildren, to make sure that they have a chance to know a safe life and lay down with their inner self in peace.

This Christmas I’ll be thinking of all of you. I’ll be hoping this writing or someone’s voice, or a person’s need will reach your heart and you will be the one to create that change in the most important place in the world, the love of your very own family.

Bless You, sweeties. Have a beautiful Merry Christmas and I’ll be waiting to hear back from the staff of House Rep Jay Hoffman after our New Year reigns in loves.

Here’s sending Magical Merry Christmas Wishes to each and everyone of you, be the change you want to see, be the one strong to ask that child –

WHO LOVES YA BABY?

Smooches y’all Smile

Patricia A McKnight

Proposer: Family Terrorist Act – ‘Trecia Ann’s Law’ for the child she was whom so many left to suffer at the hands of her own true ‘Family Terrorists’.

https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-help-your-american-society-protect-our-universal-declaration-of-human-rights-please-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

Copywrited; Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Author: ‘My Justice’ Get your copy today Smile

 

 

What message are we sending if we do not change things now?

 

Lately there has been a lot of news & education shared about the issues surrounding abuse, domestic violence, and sexual assault. Also true is the increasing knowledge and definition of a ‘terrorist’. We used to believe that a terrorist would never attack our country, that we had nothing to fear in the great country of the United States of America. We also used to hide the truth about acts of depravity, especially those concerning sexual actions with a child/minor. Today we hear of more and more adults who are talking about Actors & Hollywood Agents, Teachers, Coaches, Priests, Nuns, and even neighbors who have molested or raped us as children. What I personally hear more about, because I’ve shared my story so publicly and have put forth efforts in advocating & assisting others; is the increasing numbers of brave souls who are finally working their way through accepting the vile harm done to them by their very own parents, or a step parent. Sadly there is an estimated 40 Million adult survivors today. Hopefully they will give their signature to help make sure this doesn’t happen to another child and that if it does, there will be a chance for that child to seek justice when they are finally brave enough to face the demons and breakdown the barriers of all their endured trauma. Many of us today, Generation X (Generation No More) have suffered greatly and so have our children in our wounded aftermath. Please let’s not let anther generation of our American society live without ever being able to speak about their horrors, or to be denied justice, or to be shamed or condemned because of what someone else has done to them. No, not one more victim should have to endure the evil hauntings of their own dominating family terrorist.

What crimes describe a ‘Family Terrorist’ and what traps their victims for what can be decades into adulthood before they are ever brave enough to face their past & speak their truth, seek their justice?

The criminal actions of this type of family dominator are acts such as; child sex trafficking, sharing their child or exploiting their children amongst a particular set of friends or other family. They also commit violent molestation acts, forced oral sex and now internet display in a sexual manner of their child. They use weapons either to threaten harm or to actually inflict harm. They inflict a constant state of extreme fear of grievous bodily harm or possible death should their victim, no matter how old, ever make public or seek assistance for acts of harm against them. A ‘FAMILY TERRORIST’ has constant 24/7 access to victims & will most definitely feed off of the level of fear & trauma they can inflict without ever being caught or held responsible for detrimental harm. No one should ever have to remain silent or be held in captivity through acts of terror; held as a prisoner of silence because their pain is so vile that it could never be discussed within decent society. How moral are we if we continue denying the acts of this type of abuser, or turning away from someone we see other silent warning signs but instead of reporting a suspicious problem, we continue teaching our children to endure without tears or without ever believing that hope & help can be real if they will just speak up. It seems we teach them about what Stranger Danger is, but refuse to admit or even discuss that there might be something much worse living inside their very own home. Parental Rights is not above HUMAN RIGHTS. Protecting your child is your job, if you cannot uphold your responsibility then you either need assistance to help the family, or the child should be removed because even a child deserves the protection of their human rights.

Parental Offenders made up 92% of offenders reported in 2011, as calculated by every report entered across the nation. A total of 3.7Million Reports of Child Maltreatment, and its still climbing today

Stranger Danger was 3% of those same reports – this has to say something about who is truly harming our children!!!

Please listen in to PowerPoint Presentation

SIGN TODAY PLEASE……… https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-help-your-american-society-protect-our-universal-declaration-of-human-rights-please-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

The statement below will be emailed with your signatures. Thank you for helping. Please share with your friends and especially across your networks.

Emailed with your signature:

‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’ – A Terroristic Attack against our person can be committed by any other person at any time, even inside our homes. What gives a ‘terrorist’ more control than directly residing with their victims? In this presentation you will find the United Nations, Federal, and Illinois State Definitions of a ‘Terroristic Act’. You will also hear the many justifications for this act and some guidelines on how to implement this act. It is important to remember that the psyche of a human being who endures these types of brutal attacks or heinous depravity, especially when they are inflicted by someone who has complete control over our very existence, is twisted; what should be safe is not, what should be intimate & special, becomes ugly and worthless; what should be love, is harm; what should be a parent, becomes the greatest fear in the world. The types of actions themselves are against every level of criminal law and most certainly violate every level of our Universal Declaration of Human Rights. These are nothing less than criminal attacks and sadly most often committed against the weaker person; those who cannot refuse, cannot fight back, and either they cannot speak out to find assistance or they are threatened with severe bodily harm, even possible death if they even think about telling someone else about these vicious attacks & ugly depravity they have to keep suffering day in and day out, year after year, hoping their terrorist will die or someone will take a chance to find them rescue. How horribly sad to know that the numbers of these types of actions usually include some type of sexual harm of a child.

These types of enforced domination against our person, through vicious acts of inflicted ‘TERROR’,  threats with weapons, threats to take our lives or directly harm someone we love are committed with the sole purpose in preventing victims from seeking assistance, and therefore protects the attacker/abuser identity and prevents any form of official charges, prosecution, and/or victims restitution assistance with fear induced trauma recovery, life skills rebuilding, and many times even relocation.

The constant terroristic environment distorts our perceptions and is then taken into our schools and our streets through acts of bullying, and gun related violence, substance abuse and other disabling related issues. The dominance over another person by acts of continuous control by directly inflicted bodily harm, imposed threats of grievous bodily harm or even possible death if victims do not comply with every demand is not permitted in our already written criminal statutes, so give me your attention as I guide you through the implementation of ‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’; named after the little girl I used to be whom so many have tried to destroy through heinous cruelty and attempted murder. We must do something now to protect the Human Rights of every person in our society. We have the right to pursue life without the detrimental constant fear being our core deciding and controlling factor.

Submitted to the government of the United States of America by the concerned & educated citizens of ‘Generation No More’.

Thank you for your time and please help us move forward in implementing the amendment as above, thank you for supporting ‘Trecia’s Law’.

 

Petition created by: Patricia McKnight – Author: ‘My Justice’

contact – trish.mcknight@live.com

Supported in Partnership by: Grounds of Grace, Overcoming Human Trafficking 501c3

Exec. Director: Ms. Dana Pfeiffer

Understanding Family Terrorism–‘Family Terrorist Act’

 

As I was looking around for some more information to share in support of the ‘Family Terrorist Act’ – Trecia’s Law, mainly to bring you an update on just how many amazing signatures from strong advocate leaders, both independent & as organization leaders, who are supporting this measure. It will be wonderful to share your names with Illinois General Assembly Member, House Representative Jay Hoffman when I meet with him to discuss this further on November 25th.

So what exactly is ‘TERRORISM’?

Believe it or not there is no set explanation of ‘Terrorism’; the governments, it seems, cannot come to terms with its exact directives. This being said I’ve found quite a few written definitions during my search through our laws and miscellaneous articles. The best I’ve found is what’s written in this great article shared from Emergency Department of Military Affairs 2008.

UN Security Council Resolution 1566 (2004)

gives a definition: criminal acts, including against civilians, committed with the intent to cause death or serious
bodily injury, or taking of hostages, with the purpose to provoke a state of terror in the general public or in a group of persons or particular persons, intimidate a population or compel a government or an international organization to do or to abstain from doing any act.

United States
The United States has defined terrorism under the Federal Criminal Code. Title 18 of the United States; Code defines terrorism and lists the crimes associated with terrorism. In Section 2331 of Chapter 113(B), defines terrorism as: “…activities that involve violent… or life-threatening acts… that are a violation of the criminal laws of the United States or of any State and… appear to be intended

(i) to intimidate or coerce a civilian population;

(ii) to influence the policy of a government by intimidation or coercion;

(iii) to affect the conduct of a government by mass destruction, assassination, or kidnapping; and…

(C) occur primarily within the territorial jurisdiction of the United States…”

ref: Various Definitions of Terrorism

http://www.azdema.gov/museum/famousbattles/pdf/Terrorism%20Definitions%20072809.pdf

What do you think our familial understanding of terrorism looks like?

     There are a few examples of this I can share with you, this information is based on just a small reference to the many cases that happen like these everyday. On average, as referred to by the CDC; we have approximately 1 in 4 homes suffering in some form of Mental Health problems, substance abuse, and also violence (what we commonly refer to as Child Abuse & Domestic Violence).

     When you combine these three highly escalating issues, then we have outbursts, which can often go on for days on end, then slack off a bit before starting back up again without warning. Very rarely do we see it end permanently without intervention of some type. Commonly the acts of what we will refer here to as ‘TERRORISM’; these outburst of the dominating personality within the home will rage fiercely for quite some time about something as silly as a child’s toy being left in the living room, or perhaps dinner was not as expected; perhaps they may suspect, in their own insecurities, that their target person has said something to someone, because they know these outbursts of fierce dominating control through acts of violent rage, sexual depravity, and threats with weapons are not approved by society. These types of abusers will attack a target member of the household because of their need to feel powerful, controlling that one particular family member or perhaps the entire household; but it is their place to dominate and they will not allow another person to take that power away from them.

    These types of ‘family terrorists’ will use vicious threats against their target, and it may vary from person to person within the close family unit. Their threats are commonly done with weapons, guns or knives usually. They can hold their victim in control for hours during one specific attack or for multiples of years in repeated attacks and heinous depravity, all because there is no one to stop them. These actions are even more impacting and life traumatizing if the target of these attacks is a young child and either both parents are using extreme harmful actions against the child or they are terrorized by just one dominating parent who has terrorized others so viciously that no one feels brave enough to step in and protect that child. Terroristic acts can also be used in the severe cases of child rape, hurtful (as apposed to ‘gentle’) acts of molestation, which is also the case in painful forced oral sex acts with the parent, or in cases of child sex trafficking any of these acts might be forced between multiple persons. It is not uncommon to find more and more cases of familial child sex trafficking here in the United States, just as it is in many other countries. 

    The ‘Family Terrorist’ is also well know normally for being an alcoholic or addicted to some type of substance. This is as the numbers of unemployed or living below normal average income puts additional stress on the household. You will find that the already documented statistical information personally researched by ‘Trish’ McKnight of Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery; the stats for 2011 confirm through the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data Base that parents are 92% of all offenders in cases of Child Maltreatment Reports entered into our system across the United States.

     A person who commits an act of extreme violence, such as use of weapon, risk of severe bodily injury or a believed fear of death, they deserve to be classified as a ‘TERRORIST’ no matter which of the above definitions you wish to use. These types of monstrous attacks happen about every 10 seconds in our country and as of the report mentioned above, along with Congress noting that “For every one act of sexual abuse against a child that is reported into our nation’s systems, at least six others are never reported’; with this collected information our country has 1 in 3 children at risk of being harmed within their family. Sadly in most of the other allotted six who are never reported and no intervention or recovery process is initiated; the secret is then carried to an early grave for the survivor living in distress without the proper support services and specialized counseling to help heal the intensely deep hidden wounds left behind in the mass of destruction committed against them by the ‘Family Terrorist’ who tortured and violated them until they had hidden so much away in their trapped silence, they no longer knew their true identity and the many possible dreams they could have achieved.

I am presently searching for an attorney who would like to assist in my own case using these definitions, just so that we can have a case on the books with these already provided guided laws of ‘terrorism’. Surely there is a way we can hold these types of monsters responsible for the acts they either ignored in their home or inflicted upon a person within their home. Hopefully there is an attorney with the guts to take this crucial piece of legislature in to prove the lifelong trauma and continued level of self destructive acts which occurred because there was no person that intervened to help prevent this harm or to provide any hope of rescue. When the trauma is so severe it scars your soul and leaves you worrying about the afterlife itself, then these are cases of ‘’’terrorism’ and they should be held accountable for their actions.

      Please help in the continued work for this important measure by signing the petition through this link, Change.org –

https://www.change.org/p/u-s-house-of-representatives-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law-use-the-federal-definition-of-terrorism-for-those-who-abuse-with-unspeakable-actions?utm_medium=email&utm_source=notification&utm_campaign=new_petition_recruit#share

Feel free to leave your thoughts; Do you feel a law of this type will or will not work in today’s society? I believe that we have become a society complacent with the words Child Abuse & Domestic Violence/Interpersonal Violence. We are not shocked until it becomes an extremely vicious account declared newsworthy and shared by the media locally or even nationally. If these cases are so immensely horrific then why prosecute them for only part of the deep wounding they have left on their victims, let’s use a distinction between the different levels of abuse and the extreme types of violent depraved actions committed by what may seem a ‘monstrous’ personality.

Please friends, sign & share, let’s keep this measure moving forward.

Remember NOT ONE SINGLE PERSON IN THIS GREAT COUNTRY HAS ANY GIVEN RIGHT TO TAKE AWAY YOUR PERSONAL RIGHT TO BE SAFE!!

Patricia A. McKnight

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Cert Trainer Human Trafficking 101

Il Domestic Violence Advocate Support

Panel Speaker/Mentor/Author

‘My Justice’ – get your copy through Amazon, bn.com, Authorhouse