A memoir of horror you will not be able to put down!!
She grew up in the small town of Freeburg, Illinois a typical silent rural area where everyone sees the horror but turns the other way. Now she tells all in her fight for freedom; recovery from more than 30 years trapped in the evil torture of what her parents had trained her to tolerate as she protected their ugly secrets. Today she is a strong empowerment resource as she helps many victims, survivors & families cope with the aftermath of hell and the life of self-destruction.
Author/Advocate/Crisis Support/Radio Prod & Host/Survivor & Researcher, Fndr/CEO; Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery
‘It is impossible for me to list all of the amazing Five Star Reviews and incredible articles published for the memoir of ‘My Justice’. This was my beginning path to finally freeing myself from the life of dysfunction and self destruction, which haunted not just my life, but passed into the lives of my children from the trained tolerance and acceptance of those horrific years endured through the most vicious of sexual & physical tortures. The neglect and disregard from my own mother was so intense that the infection of rotting flesh has left my skin scarred with deep pitted memories from the evil that once was my life. The community of family friends, neighbors, school officials, even law enforcement of Freeburg Illinois, where I lived for 9 consecutive years. These citizens knew about the sadistic trafficking, torture, and witnessed or took part in the rapes & beatings; yet not one single person felt I was ever worth saving. They shunned and degraded the ‘Rotting Village Whore’. I was the girl their son’s were not allowed to date and their daughter’s were not allowed to befriend. These ‘decent Christians’ all watched as the filth from not being able to bathe in my own home took over as I grew. They witnessed the many attacks or came willingly to the parties where I was the provided entertainment, which started in my early teens. There was no childhood lived in my life. There was no love, kindness or affection; only brutal control and forced slavery to be the family caregiver and answer the ring of that little brass bell.’
What kind of a life do you grow to live when all you know is pain & evil? Who do you believe will care when an entire community discards you and leaves you abandoned in the house of horrors?
(The second floor windows where I was forced by gun point to strip at just 12 years old. He wrapped his hand fiercely over my mouth; holding me silent while he brutally raped me with the barrel of his favorite shotgun which he took hunting every single year.)
What we must see is that this is still the life many children are forced to endure silently today. They are taught silence & toleration, while the monsters who inflict such evil walk amongst us with no shame, no blame, no guilt for what they do. When will we as a human society begin to see much deeper than the surface? When will blaming the child for their disruptive behavior become a sign of something much more severe attacking them in their own home?
I say today to those children & adults being beaten, raped, molested, sold & tortured by those who should love and protect them; believe in the power of your voice. Speak up and scream out and beg for your own rescue. Do not allow the monster’s evil to control your world or destroy your future. This is your life and you are worth the fight. There is help and there is safety, there is rescue & there is hope. Please encourage those whom you know are victims of these vicious pains to seek the rescue & support, rather than be forced to live in the continued silence & toleration, protection & secrecy for the monsters who live within our families & our communities.
We are the first generation to speak of these evils and the lifelong impact of these tortures. We are indeed the new generation providing hope of life deserved and dreams to be fulfilled. We are Generation No More and the many millions of survivors living today are the teaching path of a new beginning for our children tomorrow. Be a child’s hero, do not discard and ignore, but empower & encourage, guide & protect; provide them a path to live the dreams they desire and build a better safer world tomorrow.’ Thank you to all the warriors standing strong to end the evils within our homes today!! ~~ ‘Trish’ McKnight
Five Stars for ‘My Justice’
‘If Trish’s story would have been told just 10 years ago, we would be hearing it on the Today show.’ Ms. Darlene Jones, Exec. Director Violence Prevention Center of South Western Illinois
“As you read through the chapters, you are left with a feeling of disgust, tears filling your eyes, running down your cheeks, so much sadness, making your heart pain to think that a child of 5 was subjected to so much abuse, so horrendous that it was hard to believe someone could be so inhuman, like ” the devil himself”! Each chapter leaves you in disbelief as you follow little Tricia Ann, day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year, living something that most of us would never ever experience. Follow Tricia throughout her different ages, as the innocence of a little child changes, becoming filthy, and sores oozing from her skin, taking away her self worth, tearing at her heart, as her own mother ignored her, ignored her sores, her hygiene. Shunned by everyone, by her own mother, who knew what her step-father was doing to Tricia, but did nothing to stop it, no love given to a little girl who needed it more now than ever. As you read through Patricia A. Mcknight’s memoir, “My Justice,” it is not just a book, but the truth into the life abuse, sadistic hurt, never to be able to go back to the way she once was, a fun loving little girl. Read, take in; learn how abuse turns a life inside out, never to be the same again. How you as the reader can do something, use your voice, don’t turn away, and don’t pretend that you didn’t hear, or see something happen. This is your cue; to reach out to anyone you may know or see being abused, especially an innocent child. Make this a learning tool that will reach the depths of your soul to teach you not to judge the victim, as the town where Tricia Ann lived did just that.” Mary Graziano, Special Needs Educator/Poet/Advocate
“There is a great lesson to the life and action of Ms. McKnight. And that is if we find the courage to stand up to what we believe in – which must be ourselves – then life can and will come to you with all the beauty that it holds. In Peter Thomas Senese’s ‘Heroes’ series, there is a wonderful introspective about Patricia McKnight. I think that many will benefit by reading about this woman of courage who is now living ‘My Justice’ by living in freedom. Indeed, Patricia McKnight is a hero to many: she stood up to abuse, broke the chains that confined her, and then went back to the battleground to help others.” President at Joel S. Walter and Associates, P.C., New York State
‘For me,’My Justice’ was not an easy read, not so much for the violence Patricia suffered (which was often-times horrific) but for what it said about her own mother’s denial, ignorance, and lack of love and support for this poor child with the brilliant blue eyes. Throughout her 40 + years of abuse, Patricia tried time and again to win and hold onto her mother’s love. She desperately wanted a good relationship with her mother, some acknowledgement that “Trecia” was indeed a good person to whom bad things had happened at the hands of her own husband. And her mother never, to this day, gave her that vital pleasure. This mother, for me, is as loathsome as the step-father. In the criminal justice system, people are charged, tried and convicted for aiding and abetting a crime. I can think of Patricia’s mom in no other terms: she aided and abetted this ugly, abusive step-father who took her virginity by ramming a rifle up his step-daughter’s vagina! Patricia’s mother stood beside this monster till his death, but she never once stood up for or protected her daughter. For me, this is the saddest part of My Justice. Author/Advocate Ms. Viga Boland http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18273968.No_Tears_For_My_Father
“McKnight uses details, descriptions, and a direct writing model to convey the terror of her childhood and young adulthood. The style seemed stream-of-consciousness, as if telling a story all in one breath. While reading, I held my breath, waiting to exhale. Sometimes the tense changed suddenly from past to present, indicating that emotions are not orderly concepts like chronological time. Sometimes a paragraph was written in 1st person with a sudden shift to “you” statements, as if the narrative was too hard for the author to relive in “I” statements. (First you live through it, then you experience it again when writing, and at different levels of consciousness.) Yet the readers’ final exhalation may be a sigh of relief; despite the torture and toxicity Trecia survived. My Justice is not only a memoir; it is a call to action. In her own words Patricia A. McKnight implores people to “be the extended arm of help to anyone suffering from the impact of family violence or abuse.” She lives by shining example, offering words of encouragement and opportunities for enlightenment on the subjects of child abuse, rape, incest, and domestic violence. To tell a story about good versus evil, it takes courage to face fears, compassion for oneself and others, and a conviction to tell the truth. Bravo!” Author/Advocate/Fndr Project for T.E.A.R.S./Survivor & Researcher – Lynn C. Tolson
“My Justice” deserves to be described as gripping, empowering, compelling, and a read that you do not want to put down. Equally, there are, on occassions, a very different way of writing a review of an authors work, and for me, this is one of those times. So … “Ms. McKnight, your courage to share this story, your courage to stand up Unbowed and to live in Uhuru exemplifies what is right in this world. In reading “My Justice” I know my world became closer, and in that, a better place. “My Justice” is a book that I will recommend to others – not just those entrapped in abuse, but as the lessons shared cross many boundaries, I will share it with those who have forgotten to trust and believe in themselves. Thank you for writing “My Justice” – you have written a treasure that will make this world a better place. Peter Thomas Senese Best-selling author and child advocate
“A heartbreaking true story. Victims of abuse deserve to have their stories heard and it might make people feel sad and uncomfortable to know the details of the crimes committed against those victims but we owe it to them to know these stories and hear their voice of truth. This woman is an amazing person and I wish her all the peace and happiness in the world. I listened to her tell her story at a conference in Michigan and I just wanted to walk up and hug her so tight. I wish I could’ve saved that precious little girl.” Amazon Review Five Star – Sandle
“Please pick up a copy and read it. Most people do not understand all of the factors and variables that come into play in abusive situations, and this book spells out many of these. You will get more of an idea of what children who are being abused go through, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally as well, in order to survive their abusive situations. Trish also describes the abuse that she survived in her adult life, which points out the dynamics that play out in adult abuse situations also. Once you pick up the book, you will not be able to put it down! This is a must-read, and one that everyone should share with others, so that we can eradicate both child abuse and partner abuse! I personally used ‘My Justice’ in the Family Therapy Course, which I teach through Le Sierra University, Riverside California. My students were so drawn into the story and life path of this one little girl so horrifyingly raped & tortured, neglected & discarded by all those who came through her life and had the opportunity to help her but chose not to ever say a word. This story has indeed impacted the thoughts of my students which will pass forward as they go on into their own therapy practice. ‘My Justice’ is truly a teaching path for the future and a call to action for us all to get involved.” Dr. Brenda Markert-Green; Marriage & Family Therapy Educator; Owner/CEO Afterglow Counseling, Mediation & Family Therapy
‘As an educator, I first met Ms. McKnight when she entered my fourth grade class. Being fresh out of college and a very young teacher then; she was one of my first students. In her bright blue eyes I saw just a happy, beautiful little girl. As I moved on to continue my long time career in the same school system she attended, I truly had no clue as to the life I could have saved in that child. It is only in the last few years, since first reading the details of her endured beatings and sadistic crimes of her step-father, that I have reached out and fully support every effort she puts forth on a daily basis to use her learned and lived knowledge to try and help many others. As an active member in the Retired Teachers Association and with the mentoring of upcoming educators now in college, there is not enough I can say about how this book has changed my entire thinking process. ‘My Justice’ is a book which I highly recommend for anyone who spends time with children.’ Ms. Linda Walcher: Educator in the Fayetteville & Freeburg, Illinois school system; Retired Teachers Association and Teacher’s Mentor Program Coordinator
‘The story of Patricia’s life; ‘My Justice’, is so intense it can only be compared to the horror survived by New York Times Best Seller, ‘A Child Called It’ Author,Dave Pelzer, has nothing on you!!’ Ms. Debra Mize Prevention Director, Violence Prevention Center of South Western Illinois
‘Tricia – Actually I found reading your story so horrifying that I had to put it down, walk away for a moment, and regroup before finishing reading it. No one should have lived your story. But your story certainly deserves 5 Stars!!!’ Anne Adamiak – Coordinator, Domestic Violence Intervention Team -Linkedin post***
“Friends another phenomenal review for #MyJustice to share with all of you. Thanks & respect via Tremayne Moore
“My Justice by Patricia McKnight is a memoir of her childhood abuse (and it was brutal to say the least). From the abuse of her stepfather, to her mother and children denying that little Patricia is being abused, to the school and community failing to notice any sign of abuse in a child, Patricia was marked for self-destruction.
I found myself routing for Patricia to get justice, for her to not run from therapy, and to find a love that she so truly needed where she wasn’t brutally punished! As the pages turned, I kept seeing a cycle (but this is actually what happens to people in an abusive situation that can’t seem to get out of it). Patricia was able to get to the root of the matter, close one of her major chapters to find her own path to justice.
This was a read that I won’t forget. Good job!”