Who I am today

 

miracles-happen  “I’m not feeling sorry for myself, so please don’t pity me, it really just makes the situation worse. What I need is to know that something I say or do or write will help you support someone whose been harmed, as well as prevent or intervene when something happens in your circle today.”

Over the past ten years I’ve been on a reality mission to figure out who I am, without focusing on what has been done to influence my past beliefs and behaviors. Learning about the aftermath of my personal war and the influence I have left on those I treasure most. This is not an easy process and one which comes and goes in different situations and challenges as I get stronger and learn more about myself and the actions of others; all resulting in who I am today.

My idea of self appreciation and self worth was never developed because I was put in my place, and lived in the example of who THEY thought I was or the value I carried as a person. Tragically, just in America, we have 3.7+ Million children still living in those same types of environments today. Even worse is that myself and millions of others know exactly who that child might become tomorrow, especially if they are not given help or have at least one positive person who gives them something more to believe in and seek to achieve a greater good.

My stepfather, Malcolm White, was truly walking evil; to me he was and always will be the devil himself. In fact, he used to quote; ‘Heaven doesn’t want me and the Devil is afraid I’ll take over’. I knew in my heart that he would definitely kick the Devil’s ass and de-throne him without an ounce of effort. However ridiculous as it might sound, I am still afraid of his ghost some six years or more after his death. I can still feel him lurking around like an animal after his most favorite prey. I can’t sleep for more than three or four hours at any one time, then suddenly I’m shocked awake and for a split second I’m still in harms way, even though I truly am not.

For Malcolm, the violent molesting attacks that began before he married my mother was not enough. His appetite for cruelty and deviate influence progressed to the point I became HIS PROPERTY; my mother, Mona, stepped aside and did absolutely nothing to help me or care for me ever again. I was told to shut up and stop whining. I still hear this from my siblings today on the rare occasion I speak to them at all. For me the only family I had died in March 1989 and I still mourn his death today. I just stopped by his grave last week and thanked him for helping as much as he could. He was just a boy, a boy who willingly lived in our home until he was 22yrs old; but he was a boy who stepped in front of Malcolm’s rage more than once and he stepped in front of the loaded weapons pointed at my head. He would have taken that bullet rather than see me be harmed. For John, I will never have the chance to repay what he did for me, which was the best that had happened until I was 40 yrs old.

Malcolm influenced my sexual behavior with other boys and men within the community of Freeburg beginning around age 11, when he first arranged a special party with a case of beer and about five neighborhood boys who hung with my brother. I was instructed on who to invite, how to dress, and what to encourage and allow these boys to do with me. It is the most shameful and disgusting memory that I carry. I attended school with these boys. I saw them hanging in the park everyday, and I would party with them being my ‘friends’ for the next five years.

It was just a few weeks later he took me to JB Tavern, just two blocks from our house, where my mother worked and all the coalminers hung out. I was fed double shots of vodka with orange juice, so many that I puked the entire evening and next day. We were there for about two hours when Dave and a crew of miners came in to shoot pool and toss back a few beers. I was given a dollar for the jukebox and instructed on how to ‘shake my ass’ as I played the music. I was asked to pick out the cutest guy, and then taken to his table and offered out for a trip out back or in the car; all it would cost is a couple of beers. This was my value if I had any at all, and when he looked at Malcolm and said; ‘She’s just a kid’, I was taken to the car and beaten for being so ugly no one would ever want anything to do with me at all. ‘I was lucky they wanted to ‘f***’ me’. This was who I became and just part of how I was used until I finally escaped, running to move in with the first guy who asked; a guy from thirty miles away who didn’t know anything about me or my family history. I just needed to get away before I either killed Malcolm or he killed me.

At that time I was 17yrs old; he was going to purchase a mobile home and put me on a plat of ground where he would have his own special key to come over anytime and bring whomever he wished. I didn’t care who helped me get away and I certainly didn’t take time to evaluate who he was or how he treated me. As a result of my inability to realize the inner cruelty he had, the following two years would be almost deadly on a weekly basis.

In the influence of my parents, I became the perfect lifetime victim. It didn’t take much kindness for me to open my legs and my heart; for me to seek their approval regardless of the cost, so long as I felt they wanted me. My behaviors became coping strategies. I was fed a case a beer before I turned 10 years old. It was the way Malcolm reduced my rejections or put me in a manipulating and controllable condition. I was given my first joint before I was 12 and to say the least, this is what I depended on to numb the loss and disgust that I couldn’t escape. Lance was the first to give me cocaine, and I even did a few small hits of acid; but it definitely was not for me and the cocaine was too expensive, so my constant state of being was either drinking or high, or both until I got pregnant and left the country. It was a blessing to be removed from all that surrounded me, but the man I married was not the same man I lived with over there. This man had me in the perfect place; I couldn’t escape and had no one around to talk with or convince me that I wasn’t as low a piece of crap as he insisted I was. Our society wasn’t even discussing the acts of child abuse or family violence back then and I definitely didn’t know anything other than what I had been so well trained to accept; it was my ‘normal’.

From 20 to 40 there was a handful of failed and cruel relationships, some more violent and destructive than others, but each a reflection of the only thing I knew. I fought constantly trying to absorb all of the bad so that my kids would never know that type of pain; however, I didn’t realize just how the chaos was affecting them and the example of womanhood I was giving my daughters. Imagine seeing your mom be beaten to a pulp while you’re sitting at the kitchen table waiting for her to come eat dinner with you. Suddenly the perfect plate of food she delivered to him goes flying across the room, and because she wasn’t going to sit on the couch with him, she was thrown, kicked, punched and slammed against walls, the stove, the sink and the door. Finally the fighting stops and she comes into the table, trying to calm your little sister and get everyone to eat as if nothing happened. Imagine the confusion and human value your children learn in our examples of tolerance. How do you think they will grow to see the world and what value they will hold precious about themselves? What will their children learn and how will they behave in school or in the teenage social situations as they develop?

This is our human conditioning and it leaves an ugly mark on all those affected. It distorts our value of ourselves and how we treat others. Some might become extreme protectors and put the needs of others higher than the needs of themselves and their happiness. Some might become lost in drugs, alcohol, or even deviate attacks on others. Some of those like me get so lost they can’t get out and are emotionally wounded forever; these are those prone to submissive and self harming behavior, that which commonly ends in suicide or overdose ending in death. They can’t hold productive steady employment and have chronic health conditions which studies are finding are actually early onset conditions that first show up as Juvenile Fibromyalgia or Early Post Traumatic Stress; conditions that hold trigger reactions before the person is old enough to realize the effect at all. The overall economic cost to society, becomes the taxpayers burden because of these invading health and emotional conditions that cause a reduction or inability to sustain in self supportive life development. Most have difficulty in learning skills or the development of healthy, productive life skills. After all when did they have time to concentrate on homework or study for that big test?

Personally, I’ve got so many injuries and health problems my body and my daily life are a mess. The cost of my constant healthcare in pain management, medications, various procedures, circulatory and pulmonary progressive diseases; I’ve been on disability since 2007. I would have to say that the worst of my conditions today is the permanent spinal cord trauma which has caused elongated cystic sacs to grow inside of my central canal, a condition called Syringomyelia. This alone causes wide spread severe pain, but add in the intense Fibro & Head Trauma and you’ve got a disastrous mess. I’m not feeling sorry for myself, so please don’t pity me, it really just makes the situation worse. What I need is to know that something I say or do or write will help you support someone whose been harmed, as well as prevent or intervene when something happens in your circle today.

Victims and Survivors need to know that their suffering and their voice matters to someone; that someone cares enough to help heal the wounds and make us stronger so that we can provide a better life for ourselves and more importantly our children. We need the law changes to prosecute these types of repeat heinous offenders. For most of us, we will never be given a chance at justice, because the laws of our past allow absolute minimum time to report or press charges; in Illinois these offense statutes allow only ONE YEAR after victim’s 18th birthday. Hell, I didn’t even know what the word trafficking was and definitely feared this couple so much, along with the condemnation of those around me; my life was something so destructive and disgusting I couldn’t tell anyone what happened to me at all until I was around 35 years old. Some knew that my childhood wasn’t pleasant, but no one, including myself, really knew just how evil and tragic it was.

We are NOT our parents, and we do NOT have to live in the sorrow, pain, and pattern of harm or victim they taught us. We have a choice today and we can actually use the strength of amazing survivors who are finally able to discuss what’s happened; use their courage to speak up as a precious gift. This is a strength beyond measure they cling to and can use, not just to help themselves, but to influence how we help and how we can truly save the life of someone else today. You can be the one to step in and take the bullet; you can stop the bleeding and help stitch up the wounds of our kids lost in the pattern of destruction, crime, drugs, and harm they are trying to survive today. Please don’t sit on the sidelines and judge what that person should or shouldn’t do, because until that same personal violation is against you, then you can never know how it feels or the damage it causes. You may be stronger than they are and bounce back with no problem, but you may watch someone else slowly disintegrate so horribly that it becomes their own extinction.

Today I use my past, all of it; my behaviors and my pain, my bad choices and the influence I’ve seen continue in my children and grand children’s lives; I use all of this hoping that somehow I can help empower one other survivor to believe they absolutely matter. Hoping that I can inspire one victim to get help for themselves and their family. Hoping that I can change the offensive behavior of someone who has been harmed, but reacts and attacks others in their pain. We DO NOT have to harm others or devalue ourselves, because on this amazing planet; every life and every breath taken truly matters and we all have the power to do something about it.

Be a Hope-Line & save a life

Thank you for reading & I do hope you’ll share

Love for all,

‘Trish’

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Author: ‘My Justice’     mj-2

http://www.facebook.com/triciagirl62  

Promo 07.17.2016

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Will we just keep counting the bodies……..

Headline       biopic3_thumb.png

http://www.clipsyndicate.com/video/play/5717473

Interview courtesy of: WCIAtv, reporter Jessica Kunz

This is a fabulous interview and friends I am extremely grateful for the past few months of interviews I’ve been blessed to take part in; this one by Jessica and two others with Investigative Reporter, Eric Steltzer WANDtv.com (links for these two interviews listed below). My concern however; can someone possibly explain to me why we would rather just keep counting the bodies of the millions of children harmed everyday by family sex trafficking or family terroristic abuse and torment; keep counting the lives of millions destroyed by these acts every year rather than addressing the issue head-on?

Dammit I’m FURIOUS!!! I’ve handled just about all of the authoritative rejection I can possibly deal with on this issue. These past 5 years have been spent channeling as much energy as possible in providing education, awareness, activism, and advocating for the individual basic right to be safe, especially for our children. Many other outstanding advocates have either teamed up with me personally, or have done their own exhaustive advocating on the very serious pandemic numbers which continue to climb above 3.5 million every year, and those are just the numbers of child maltreatment reports. However, because of the mandates, which are not updated to address the hidden trauma behind the family terroristic nature of the abuse to force a child to remain silent and simply endure whatever it is their parent continues to dish out on them day after day, year after year, until they are old enough to get away or they end up self destructing. Sadly many thousands of these wounded souls commit suicide every year, because the trauma is just too severe to overcome and the heavy burden of shame and silence refuses to be addressed by those in our community and our politicians who have the power to create the changes needed to save their lives.

Yes, I’ve used my own personal story, but I don’t feel its my right to discuss someone else’s history. Also the nature of my very public and well known family sex trafficking, exploitation, terrorized slavery, and disfiguring neglect is really one of the most extreme cases I’m aware of, as is with a few other survivors, but none to the public knowledge that mine exceeded in our small rural community.  However, rest assured my goal is NOT for personal gain, but rather to create one of the strongest untied stands across the country in our human history to ensure that these crimes STOP NOW!!

I’ve been shut down by the Illinois Dept of Public Health, stating my story was too graphic and although April’s conference in Peoria was for the qualified trained professionals on Women’s Health and Family Wellness; I was told I needed to tune back my story and reduce the graphic nature of those 30+ years in hell. They had professionals declining to attend my presentation because it was just more than they could possibly handle. Do they realize that children are still suffering in these tragedies everyday? Do they realize that if they do not face it and discuss it, they will NEVER get a child to discuss it with them? Do they realize that by refusing to listen for one hour as I talk about the actions of Family Crimes and the extreme trauma involved when the acts have been committed with complete malice, in a form of terroristic nature, for the sole purpose of silencing the child and preventing them from ever feeling safe enough to talk about these ugly secrets, thus preventing any criminal charges against the parents who commit and allow these grievous acts? Do they realize the continue teaching of shame, rejection, and of course, SECRET KEEPING they enforce when they as trained healthcare professionals cannot handle listening to a one hour presentation which will help them spot and treat, assess and assist a victim of any age trapped in these vicious attacks?

Last October, I teamed up with a personal friend and the Legal Advocacy Director for Violence Prevention Center of Southwestern Illinois. I had been working on a proposal to address the very serious crimes within our family unit and the terroristic nature in which they were constantly kept secret and silent. Lisa Chilton and I took the proposal to Illinois House Representative Jay Hoffman, then to Illinois States Attorney Brendan Kelly, and in late February I was notified that ‘terroristic’ was not the proper or acceptable word to use, and out of ten guidelines in the proposal they were ready to introduce a measure to change the Statute of Limitations for a barrage of criminal sexual offenses against a child, including involuntary sexual servitude. The measure House Bill #3242 was going to change our S.O.L. from 1 year after victims 18th birthday, to 20 years, which would allow the victims time to first escape the parental control and then go through the very long and grieving process of accepting what had actually happened, then they could bring forth criminal charges by the time they were 38 years old. However, when I emailed Representative Hoffman last week about a date they would be introducing this bill, I received what seemed to me, a proper political email; “I regret to inform you we had other bills processed and decided not to address this issue at this time, but rest assured I am determined to stand behind your cause.” I really do not mean to offend Representative Hoffman, IL Dept of Public Health, or any other of our legislators or our state and national resources, but I certainly would like to ask, ‘When will the body count be serious enough for our systems to finally take a very public stand and address what changes need to be implemented to ensure we are doing our very best; not only protect the individual rights of our children, all victims to be safe, but also update our public policy on how we assess, assist, and investigate every report of maltreatment made across the country?’

There is another person whom I’ve partnered with, Dana Pfeiffer, Director of Grounds of Grace a nonprofit resource assisting victims of human trafficking, terroristic abuse, and other related family crimes around Central Illinois, including our State Capital of Springfield where the amazing President Lincoln began his strongest political campaign, which later led to the equal rights to FREEDOM for all persons. The Emancipation Proclamation granting freedom for all persons to be seen equal in the eyes of our laws, without regard to race, religion, gender, and age. These are our basic Human & Civil Rights, written into law by our United Nations General Assembly in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, and our own American Constitution; in fact it is the basic freedoms our country was founded on but yet we still can’t truly stand up for those rights, especially when it comes to our children and the desperate destruction happening within our families every single day.

Dana Pfeiffer and I have teamed up in speaking engagements as I present my history and what I advocate for today, she is right by my side validating the serious crimes she helps victims escape committed by their family, most commonly their parents. The numbers she assists continues to climb, victims as young as 2 years old to 68 years old. When I address people in authority, or in any setting, about the serious nature of my case, it is not for your pity. I don’t need your pity and absolutely DO NOT WANT YOUR PITY. I’ve survived and my life is very good today. I am safe, I am loved, and if my children and grandchildren weren’t still dealing with the emotional staining from those acts that distorted and destroyed the safe path in my life; my life today would actually be quite perfect.

However, what I do hope those who hear my story, or read ‘My Justice’, will take from all of the extreme vicious and very public nature of exploitation, sex trafficking, terrorized slavery, and the disfiguring neglect of all basic human needs; I WANT YOUR ACTION. We need to ensure not another single person is abandoned and judged as I was throughout the six consecutive years of family friends, school teachers, neighbors, adult men and boys who got their own special time with the child, the law enforcement who knew me well and didn’t care at all that my skin was rotting and filth covered because I could not even safely bathe in my home. Every person in Freeburg, Illinois knew my family, knew my mother;‘POOR WOMAN, having to deal with such a horrible man’.

Guess what towns people, she didn’t deal with him at all, cause he was like a comforting blanket who kissed the ground she walked on. He would have done anything for her, and he did leave my brother and sister alone, but me; I was his target. I was his to do with as he pleased, she not only sacrificed me for him to do with as he pleased, but she also abandoned all basic human needs, ordered me to care for, cook for, and provide for the family needs, she purchased him a little brass bell that only I was expected to answer to at all times. The citizens of Freeburg either witnessed, took part in, or saw the very public destruction of a young growing girl and tagged her as the ‘Village Whore’, rather than try to help her. When I reached out today asking those in public office, those in media who have the ability to share this story, those who fight for protective rights and those in every small community; still all I have felt is that same sense of disregard I lived with all my life. No one cared when it was my parents. No one reported the many years of almost murderous attacks and beatings in my relationships and marriages. Neighbors, police, and healthcare all dismissed the horrific nature of my daily life and figured I didn’t deserve their help then, and apparently the continuing climbing numbers of those speaking about these past decades in hell, they are all getting those same closed doors as I am today.

When I write, do interviews, or even the creation of our petition addressing Family Crimes and Terroristic Abuse (link below for you to sign now), what I want, what all of the hundreds of survivors hope to achieve in sharing our voices today; we want to inspire every healthcare worker, every educator, every community member to notice the warning signs of the desperate victims and rather than abandon them and judge them for the disgusting behavior or promiscuous nature of their acts, HELP THEM!! Maybe you’ll be the one to rescue them; to give them a chance to heal their wounds, learn the positive behaviors and become better parents for their children. It’s easy to look at a family or a person, pass our taught nature of judgment and then turn away and do nothing, but it takes great courage to say that every life matters and EVERY CHILD DESERVES TO BE SAFE!!!

I don’t understand why, throughout our entire human existence, the authorities who have the power to do something simply disregard the serious body count related to suicide, murder, and self destruction from these vicious and disgusting acts, especially when committed against a helpless child who cannot fight back, cannot run away; they can only endure in silent tears the shameful brutal crimes committed against them by their parents and family. I really do not understand why we do not step up and scream out; ‘THAT’S IT, THIS IS NOT THAT CHILD’S CRIME AND SHOULD NOT BE THAT CHILD’S BLAME’!!

How many more centuries will people have to endure these types of attacks within their homes, by their parents or their partners, then walk away filled with pain and terror, while the offenders are protected by the forced ugly secrets of torture and trafficking, or they walk away with a slap on the wrist rather than the harshest punishments deserving of their actions? It is their choice to attack and terrorize, especially when they are attacking and forcing a child into dark secrets and a life filled with destructive behaviors and continued shame in the feeling of not being worth saving. We have hundreds of documented studies which reveal how a life in traumatic events and vile attacks impacts the lives of individuals. We have studies confirming the frontal lobe brain development impaired and twisted by the repeated years trying to survive and making daily decisions based on what they need to do in order to just survive that day. We have the National Child Traumatic Stress Network, the Centers for Disease and Control, National Domestic Violence Hotline, Prevent Child Abuse America and many other outstanding organizations which hold rallies, they help victims recover and rebuild their lives; yet we cannot get a public policy legislator to truly address and make it their public platform to face the very serious pandemic numbers which continue to soar above three million reports every single year. I’m tired of counting the bodies, I’m disheartened by the lack of public concern and the constant avoidance of the direct issues. Constantly I pray that someday all that happened to me, and many other millions like me, will one day matter to those who have the power to mandate our laws and protect the very precious right to simply BE SAFE!! The rights to be free; free from harm and free from fear. One day we will protect the rights of every human being to be safe, no matter who is harming them. What worries me most, is how many lives will it cost us before we actually begin implementing the changes needed to ensure we are doing the very best for our children’s future tomorrow.

Let’s stop counting the bodies and do something about the crimes!!

Thanks for reading, perhaps you’ll also sign our petition here —- https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-please-enforce-the-right-to-be-safe-for-all-persons-especially-our-children-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

I’d like to thank Investigative Reporter Eric Steltzer with WANDtv.com for the fabulous interviews and share those links with readers here…..Courtesy of WANDTV.com

1) http://www.wandtv.com/category/182814/video?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=11396570

2) http://www.wandtv.com/category/182814/video?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=11166176

In closing, Ms. Dana Pfeiffer & Ms. Lisa Chilton, thank you both my friends for your ongoing support and your courage to continue rescuing and assisting all the victims who come into your path. You are both angels and we need your efforts in helping to encourage our society that now is the time to create the greatest change for our human society and protect all persons before something horrific enters their life to destroy the special magic of their spirit within. I’d like to thank Ms Linda Walcher, Kristen Eng, Amie Loman, and Exec Director Darlene Jones of the Violence Prevention Center of SW IL, Mr. Donn Willeford of Hoyleton Ministries, Michal Madison, Mary Graziano, Kelly Townsend, Julia De’Alfanzo, Tammy Fox, Bill Murray, Petra Luna and many hundreds of other amazing advocates who continue to fight the good fight and support victims, survivors, and families touched by the horrible cycle of these crimes. Together we can all make a huge difference, and remember by making the choice today to protect just one person in your life’s circle, to be a positive influence in their lives; you hold the power to change their life’s path, eventually protecting their children and their grandchildren from all the suffering which impacts that victim today.

Blessings & thank you readers,

Patricia A McKnight

Author; ‘My Justice’

Fndr: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Steps to Recovery –Daily Rebuilding Skills

Family Crimes & Terroristic Abuse Training Program

Contact me today for your next eventtrish.mcknight@live.com

www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

Are you part of the new generation in charge, we are #GenerationNoMore

 

ftactbnr

We need your signatures, your voices, your stories!!

To persons voted into office by the people, to always protect

the Human Rights for the people, of the United States of America.

We come to you with our collective voting voices and ask you to amend the prosecution against the more extreme violent cases of Child Abuse & Domestic/Family/Relationship Violence. It is time we realize there are many different levels of these crimes within our family unit, our homes; these crimes are heinous & brutal for the purpose of inflicting the highest level of fear or a truly believed sense of certain death, therefor silencing victims and preventing them from finding any form of assistance or rescue. These are crimes of torture and are in the classifications for; Crimes of Terroristic Acts.

The explanation of the ‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’ is built from the basis of our Universal Declaration of Human Rights and taken from the definitions provided in our ‘Federal Terrorism Act’ being an act of harm, or detrimental fear, which does create or impose a risk of grievous bodily injury or possible death if victims do not comply.

Friends, advocates, organization leaders, warriors, survivors; you are the concerned & educated persons in our voting society. It is time to make this request and ask our leaders to put our personal right to be safe & live safe, especially within our homes; make this the priority of our nation!!

Please sign, share, help promote, encourage others to sign – this is where our United Voices Matter.

By signing this petition the below information will be sent with your signature!! Thank you all!!

‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’ – A Terroristic Attack against our person can be committed by any other person at any time, even inside our homes. What gives a ‘terrorist’ more control than directly residing with their victims. In this presentation you will find the United Nations, Federal, and Illinois State Definitions of a ‘Terroristic Act’. You will also hear the many justifications for this act and some guidelines on how to implement this act. It is important to remember that the psyche of a human being who endures these types of brutal attacks or heinous depravity, especially when they are inflicted by someone who has complete control over our very existence, is against every level of our Universal Declaration of Human Rights. These are criminal attacks on every level and often committed against the weaker party, meaning against those who cannot refuse, cannot fight back, and cannot speak out to find any form of assistance or rescue; mostly sadly our children.

These types of enforced domination against our person, through vicious acts of inflicted ‘TERROR’,  threats with weapons, threats to take our lives or direct harm to someone we love are committed with the sole purpose in preventing victims from seeking assistance, and therefore protects the attacker/abuser identity and prevents any form of official charges, prosecution, and/or victims restitution for the ongoing recovery for the constant inflicted fear, life skills development to become a self sufficient individual.

The constant terroristic environment distorts our perceptions and is then taken into our schools and our streets through acts of bullying, and gun related violence, substance abuse and other disabling related issues. The dominance over another person by acts of continuous control by directly inflicted bodily harm, imposed threats of grievous bodily harm or even possible death if victims do not comply with every demand is not permitted in our already written criminal statutes. Now you need to hear our voices and direct your attention to the implementation of ‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’; named after the little girl I used to be whom so many have tried to destroy through heinous cruelty and attempted murder. We must do something now to protect the Human Rights of every person in our society. We have the right to pursue life without the detrimental threat of harm lurking about & ready to attack within our very own homes.

We submit our signatures & our stories to the government of the United States of America by the concerned & educated citizens of America. Today we are ‘Generation No More’.

Thank you for your time and please help us move forward in implementing the amendment as above, thank you for supporting ‘Trecia’s Law’.

Patricia McKnight

Author; ‘My Justice’

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio

What message are we sending if we do not change things now?

 

Lately there has been a lot of news & education shared about the issues surrounding abuse, domestic violence, and sexual assault. Also true is the increasing knowledge and definition of a ‘terrorist’. We used to believe that a terrorist would never attack our country, that we had nothing to fear in the great country of the United States of America. We also used to hide the truth about acts of depravity, especially those concerning sexual actions with a child/minor. Today we hear of more and more adults who are talking about Actors & Hollywood Agents, Teachers, Coaches, Priests, Nuns, and even neighbors who have molested or raped us as children. What I personally hear more about, because I’ve shared my story so publicly and have put forth efforts in advocating & assisting others; is the increasing numbers of brave souls who are finally working their way through accepting the vile harm done to them by their very own parents, or a step parent. Sadly there is an estimated 40 Million adult survivors today. Hopefully they will give their signature to help make sure this doesn’t happen to another child and that if it does, there will be a chance for that child to seek justice when they are finally brave enough to face the demons and breakdown the barriers of all their endured trauma. Many of us today, Generation X (Generation No More) have suffered greatly and so have our children in our wounded aftermath. Please let’s not let anther generation of our American society live without ever being able to speak about their horrors, or to be denied justice, or to be shamed or condemned because of what someone else has done to them. No, not one more victim should have to endure the evil hauntings of their own dominating family terrorist.

What crimes describe a ‘Family Terrorist’ and what traps their victims for what can be decades into adulthood before they are ever brave enough to face their past & speak their truth, seek their justice?

The criminal actions of this type of family dominator are acts such as; child sex trafficking, sharing their child or exploiting their children amongst a particular set of friends or other family. They also commit violent molestation acts, forced oral sex and now internet display in a sexual manner of their child. They use weapons either to threaten harm or to actually inflict harm. They inflict a constant state of extreme fear of grievous bodily harm or possible death should their victim, no matter how old, ever make public or seek assistance for acts of harm against them. A ‘FAMILY TERRORIST’ has constant 24/7 access to victims & will most definitely feed off of the level of fear & trauma they can inflict without ever being caught or held responsible for detrimental harm. No one should ever have to remain silent or be held in captivity through acts of terror; held as a prisoner of silence because their pain is so vile that it could never be discussed within decent society. How moral are we if we continue denying the acts of this type of abuser, or turning away from someone we see other silent warning signs but instead of reporting a suspicious problem, we continue teaching our children to endure without tears or without ever believing that hope & help can be real if they will just speak up. It seems we teach them about what Stranger Danger is, but refuse to admit or even discuss that there might be something much worse living inside their very own home. Parental Rights is not above HUMAN RIGHTS. Protecting your child is your job, if you cannot uphold your responsibility then you either need assistance to help the family, or the child should be removed because even a child deserves the protection of their human rights.

Parental Offenders made up 92% of offenders reported in 2011, as calculated by every report entered across the nation. A total of 3.7Million Reports of Child Maltreatment, and its still climbing today

Stranger Danger was 3% of those same reports – this has to say something about who is truly harming our children!!!

Please listen in to PowerPoint Presentation

SIGN TODAY PLEASE……… https://www.change.org/p/mr-president-help-your-american-society-protect-our-universal-declaration-of-human-rights-please-enforce-family-terrorist-act-trecia-s-law

The statement below will be emailed with your signatures. Thank you for helping. Please share with your friends and especially across your networks.

Emailed with your signature:

‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’ – A Terroristic Attack against our person can be committed by any other person at any time, even inside our homes. What gives a ‘terrorist’ more control than directly residing with their victims? In this presentation you will find the United Nations, Federal, and Illinois State Definitions of a ‘Terroristic Act’. You will also hear the many justifications for this act and some guidelines on how to implement this act. It is important to remember that the psyche of a human being who endures these types of brutal attacks or heinous depravity, especially when they are inflicted by someone who has complete control over our very existence, is twisted; what should be safe is not, what should be intimate & special, becomes ugly and worthless; what should be love, is harm; what should be a parent, becomes the greatest fear in the world. The types of actions themselves are against every level of criminal law and most certainly violate every level of our Universal Declaration of Human Rights. These are nothing less than criminal attacks and sadly most often committed against the weaker person; those who cannot refuse, cannot fight back, and either they cannot speak out to find assistance or they are threatened with severe bodily harm, even possible death if they even think about telling someone else about these vicious attacks & ugly depravity they have to keep suffering day in and day out, year after year, hoping their terrorist will die or someone will take a chance to find them rescue. How horribly sad to know that the numbers of these types of actions usually include some type of sexual harm of a child.

These types of enforced domination against our person, through vicious acts of inflicted ‘TERROR’,  threats with weapons, threats to take our lives or directly harm someone we love are committed with the sole purpose in preventing victims from seeking assistance, and therefore protects the attacker/abuser identity and prevents any form of official charges, prosecution, and/or victims restitution assistance with fear induced trauma recovery, life skills rebuilding, and many times even relocation.

The constant terroristic environment distorts our perceptions and is then taken into our schools and our streets through acts of bullying, and gun related violence, substance abuse and other disabling related issues. The dominance over another person by acts of continuous control by directly inflicted bodily harm, imposed threats of grievous bodily harm or even possible death if victims do not comply with every demand is not permitted in our already written criminal statutes, so give me your attention as I guide you through the implementation of ‘Family Terrorist Act’ – ‘Trecia’s Law’; named after the little girl I used to be whom so many have tried to destroy through heinous cruelty and attempted murder. We must do something now to protect the Human Rights of every person in our society. We have the right to pursue life without the detrimental constant fear being our core deciding and controlling factor.

Submitted to the government of the United States of America by the concerned & educated citizens of ‘Generation No More’.

Thank you for your time and please help us move forward in implementing the amendment as above, thank you for supporting ‘Trecia’s Law’.

 

Petition created by: Patricia McKnight – Author: ‘My Justice’

contact – trish.mcknight@live.com

Supported in Partnership by: Grounds of Grace, Overcoming Human Trafficking 501c3

Exec. Director: Ms. Dana Pfeiffer

Announcement Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio

 

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We have shared many broadcasted programs during these past 18 months and I am so grateful to the many guests, chatters, supporters who have joined us or have shared our shows. In truth, I absolutely love doing radio. It’s an exciting way to continue passing the crucial need for grassroots community resources to provide assistance for victims, survivors & families who have been touched by some form of abuse, violence, trafficking, bullying and the many other types of personally violating crimes.

It saddens me to announce we are no longer going to be broadcasting, but I feel it is the best decision at this time. One, is the need for me to focus on my writing. Two is the need for funding to continue the premium broadcasting programs which have been enjoyed by listeners around the world, especially Wednesday’s Survivors World. It has been such a connecting and healing opportunity for each of us and I am grateful to have had this opportunity.

Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery will be here to help anyone in need, no matter if we are on radio or not. Our organization is about supporting those in need and helping to educate about the true impact from these types of traumas. We will continue our training, our support, our awareness mission and the connections that have been made through our work.

Continuously I share my own journey as well as the information I learn in other specific trainings, which have focused on Sexual Assault, Mandatory Reporting, Human Trafficking, Elder Abuse, Domestic Violence & Child Abuse. I wanted to be sure to provide the very best assistance for the many hundreds of families, victims & even more survivors who have contacted me  over these past 4 years. The educational trainings I’ve taken have given me the ability to disconnect from my own personal trauma when assisting those in need. It is difficult at times to assist with the many levels of trauma and the personally emotional wounding left in its aftermath, so the trainings give the expert knowledge shared by states across the country.

Our radio programs have given us the opportunity to reach around the world, empower many to find the courage to break their silence about the ugly family secrets which have haunted their lives and even made parenting their own children difficult at best. It is my personal hope that as a human society we will begin to see just how valuable our children really are. They are precious souls who depend on the adults around them to protect them and guide them through to adulthood. Sometimes, as wounded parents, we are triggered throughout different levels of our children’s lives, which then impacts the way we connect with them and see their developing ways. In finding the courage to begin our own healing we  find the ability to positively influence their lives in the manner we wish in our hearts.

Please readers, I do hope that if nothing else touches your heart in all the work we do as an organization; you will empower the many wounded souls you come in contact with to believe they deserve true happiness. However, to achieve that happiness we must first learn that at no time should anyone ever have the power to harm you, condemn you, or trap you in their inflicted pain. Every human being is created for a purpose, but that purpose is NEVER to be the victim of this type of cruelty. You can and will achieve your own healing, your own dreams, your own freedom when you make the decision to end the abuses and harm against you. Make the call to report the offender. Make the call to a resource of support to help you through. You do not have to go through professional counseling to heal the wounds of your trauma. You simply need a friend who will support you in your journey, believe the trauma you’ve endured and the many impacts it has left on your perceptions, lack of boundaries, and the decisions you make.

You can and will achieve your freedom, positively influence and guide your children, become the strong spirit you were intended to be, and most of all find your own path to happiness, but first you must be willing to face the trauma and learn to understand how these types of harm actually leave their own mark on the young developing minds and souls of the child you once were. Grab hold of a hand, take a deep breath, get ready to face the darkest of days; walk the path into your own true light. It may not be perfect, but there is certainly a light on the other side of this harm and you deserve to follow the rainbow of life and love waiting there in your healing journey.

Life is a miracle not to be wasted, you deserve roses in your magical garden!!

Call a resource of help, hope, and healing today!!! You could save your life or the life of someone you know and love. Let no person be trapped in the cruelty and condemnation of abuse, violence, human trafficking or bullying. There is help on the other end of these listed, trusted, and nationally recognized resources. Be your own hero today!!hotlines (2)

You are strong – You are courageous – You are worthy – You are magical

Be safe, live strong, always fly free!!!

youarenotalone

All information published in connection with Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery & Butterfly Dreams Talk Radio is protected under the development of our organization and copyright founded Sept. 2012

Patricia A. McKnight

Owner/CEO: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery & Talk Radio Programming

Founder Survivors World Support Group Nov. 2010

Speaker/Trainer/Writer/Radio Host & Producer

Mentor/Peer Counseling/Advocate

Author: ‘My Justice’ – Finally removing the thick coal stained hand that crept in an stole the most powerful weapon of my safety; taking back my power and finally speaking my own truth.

 

 

Broken Parents creating Broken Children

 

IMG_6807 Through this writing I hope to touch the heart of just one family, just one broken parent or confused child, to believe in hope. I hope that in some way, through my voice and the hundreds of others, we as a society can provide a resource within every community to help families deal directly with these issues, rather than turning away, passing judgment, placing blame, and ignoring the signs we have learned can lead to something much worse; look deeper than the surface and heal the broken souls within.

This is what happens when broken children become broken parents without anyone willing to notice or help provide the resources and support they need to mend their family unit. This is the part I cannot stress enough, which should be so important in our society today; healing the parents to empower their ability to protect & guide their children with love, patience, understanding and most of all without the threat of sexual contact stealing away their child’s inner being.

There is a very large piece of the puzzle which I cannot speak about publicly in detail, because it is not my story to tell; it is the inner lives of my children and grandchildren. Many of you have heard me share about the dysfunction which continues to invade my bloodline; the 3rd generation touched by the evil which so many witnessed, permitted and some even took part in a long time ago.

 Those many adults in the small community of Freeburg decided I wasn’t a harmed child, I was just a whore!! Sadly I was just a kid forced to endure his evil, her disregard & severe neglect; all those years abandoned within a house of hell!!

They trained me you know. Mona & Malcolm both; they trained me to believe I was not even human. If they would have forced me to eat from the dog’s bowl, which I’m really surprised they didn’t; it could not have been any more evil in that house. You may not have been aware of just how cruel it was on the inside, but that which many of you did witness would be enough to hopefully alarm any neighbor, family friend, educator or police force today. However, it still amazes me how many children still fall through the cracks of our distorted perceptions of what is allowed within the family unit.

Today all my nightmares are history and despite the deep scarring effect, it only matters because of how that which was permitted against a little girl way back then, twisted the child’s thoughts, decision process, and perception of what was to be accepted & tolerated within her life; leaving a broken dysfunctional mess who went from one abuser to the next looking for love and acceptance, then had children in the mix of her own adult confusion.

 Well today the dysfunction left behind still invades the lives of my grandchildren in some form and that makes me angry, hurt, sad.

In all honesty I didn’t think I’d ever be able to get pregnant. After all those years of unprotected sex, internal injury from multiple rapes; worst of all being the shotgun barrel he used when I was twelve. Then there was all the ongoing years without any medical care or cleaning, how could I have expected to ever have children? Really I didn’t think God considered me worthy of being a ‘mom’ but in the end He did and they are still the three most cherished gifts I’ve ever been given.

When I begin to look inside myself during these past years of healing. The hardest part was accepting how what I had allowed and the decisions I made in my broken adult self, had effected the healthy development of my children and their sense of what a stable secure life was really like. There were many years of painful abuse & violence which distorted my views and until I was 35 years old, I seriously didn’t even know there were places of help who would have given us safe shelter and provided me with a beginning start on life skills to better handle things.

My children were stuck going through the physical rule and verbal degradation of their father, then the wrath of their stepfather for another four years before I was strong enough to take a chance and break away from my ‘normal’; the only way of life I had ever known. I wasn’t sure I could handle providing what my young children needed to survive. Housing, food, clothing, school it was all a terrifying thought, but I absolutely had to take that chance if I ever wanted them to know some sense of family love without harm.

Today we often ask; ‘Why does that abused parent stay when they are being harmed, beaten, almost murdered? We blame that parent rather than see their broken distorted views of what life and family is all about.  You wouldn’t even begin to imagine how well I was trained to believe this type of thing was all I deserved. In truth this type of brutal cruelty was the only ‘normal’ I ever knew.

The tolerance, the need for wanting to be loved, the sense that I wasn’t capable of providing my kids the life they deserved, that I couldn’t survive without a partner in my life, the desperate need for someone to ‘love’ me and just accept me lasted through twenty years and six different men. The abuse covered absolutely every form and exploded on many different levels. I just cannot explain the full impact this ended up having on my children’s lives.

 How many other children and families are dealing with this same cycle of pain passing through their lives today? We can only take the statistical information and multiply it by what Congress has stated; ‘For every one report that is made at least six others are not’. Think about the HUGE number of families and victims who never report a single attack against them, and the children who have no voice at all in their home.

What of those who are like me; abandoned and left to believe it was all they deserve and no one will ever care, so why should they ever reach out for help or bother with making a report? What of those broken parents who believe they will have their children whisked away because of the violence and abuse they continue to tolerate? We need to provide resources so they can heal their own lives, then help them become the parents they need to be, responsible & protective, nurturing & gentle.

My greatest guilt is that I didn’t realize the wounded impact it would have on their lives as they grew up, even though we had broken away and had our own house of safety, filled with a family bond, love, laughter, and no exploding violence. 

Although my children may admit they knew I loved them, or they may even remember the treats, special holidays, birthdays and other such events filled with many moments of laughter, love, and family bonding; our lives were chaos from my emotional stresses, the wounding left from all those decades of violence mixed with the lack of life skills to keep us going. Needless to say most of their good memories are outweighed by the disruption of violence or emotional dysfunction within their home. The relationship I have with my adult children is still very broken; it is all so crisscrossed with the insane aftermath of what happened way back when.

Today my greatest worry is my grandchildren? Are they going to live knowing what it’s like to really be safe and be at peace within their homes? Will their lives be stable or will they grow within the invasion of the ongoing cycle of dysfunction? Sadly, I know this answer as I’ve seen how its already played out in their early lives, but I pray there will be someone who can help me convince my children of how deep this ugly nightmare bleeds into our family and the need for them to find a way to face the truth of their own need to heal. I’m constantly worrying about their decisions and what I know they already accept in their relationships, the sacrifices they lay on their children rather than listening to the pleas of their mother to connect with the resources I give them and heal themselves; become the parents their children deserve before there is serious harm and they have to face the same child/parent crisis I deal with today.

Do you think they will ever understand why I have chosen to be the strong voice against abuse that I’ve worked so hard to become today? Do you think they understand how it all connects together and until they heal their wounds, accept their own faults as much as their abilities; only then can they become the truly capable parents their children need? Will they ever understand how it breaks my heart to know there is nothing more I can do to help them, that today it is all in their adult hands and they lay out the future for how it will effect their children’s normal growth, development and possible success in life?  The truth is that the more I beg them to look at their lives and decisions, their choices and feelings, and how it all impacts their children’s lives, this is usually when they become tempered with me or they cut me out altogether.

Sadly, as I look at this deep set disconnection with my children all I can do is cry. It rips my heart apart and shreds me of any desire to continue moving forward at all. I want to break into pieces, I want to hide in the darkness, I want to scream out ‘I LOVE YOU’, but I know the depth of that love will never be heard. It is a tragedy I hope none of you have to bare, but for those many broken parents like me it is almost a certainty. Today I am so tired of this screwed up insane disconnection to the three persons who had given me a reason to live.  How I long for them to understand the strength it took for me to take that chance and escape the violent life, buy us a house, and then be even stronger to get rid of the different abusers who would follow. Isn’t it time they found some level of compassion for the woman who did her best to create a safe home for them, instill decency and good values, made sure we had dinner together every night, attended school functions with great pride in their accomplishments and some special treat for their efforts; the one who kept them believing in their dreams even when others told them it was a waste of time.

It feels as if nothing will earn me the compassion and forgiveness from my children, not their understanding or simple love for the mother I tried to be then and the woman I am still becoming today. I cannot wish away the mess of yesterday nor can I be the one who heals their wounds today. They are broken, they are enduring the aftermath of those once tolerated acts of their mother.. They are treading water trying to figure out why they can’t get out of the mess or how in the hell they ended up there in the first place? Now I can only suggest ways for them to work through things, provide resource contacts as I would for anyone, or be the one to hear their cries over the phone. They are adults now and it is time for them to take on their own adult responsibilities. It is time to release me from the sole blame for all that went wrong, and let go of the brainwashing forced into their heads so long ago. It is time for them to mend their ways, accept their own wrong behaviors & decisions, and begin giving their children the lives they deserve.

This share is for all of the parents who carry the heartbreak of how their own wounding that has cycled into their children’s lives despite all their efforts to change and protect, love & guide. This is what we as a society must begin to accept today if we hope to help end this ongoing insanity and life altering impact of family violence & dysfunction in our children’s lives. Can we continue allowing it to go on without addressing the deep rooted truth? We continue to learn through the many hundreds sharing their history of wicked torture and dysfunction, that what happens within our own family can often be the most evil danger our children will ever experience. I hope we can learn from these many incredible survivors of hell.

Thanks so much to those who help me make it through with your positive hope and the friendships I’ve built. Blessings to the wounded souls of yesterday. May our families heal and this be the end of the ever present ongoing destruction that cycles through our generations. Believe that you can be the beginning of change within your family unit. I wish you peace and inner balance to mend the wounds of our past and provide the healing hope many families are in need of today. 

Dream big, expect miracles, and never accept anything less than love & safety

Thank you  bdarBANNER

©Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

Fndr/CEO: Patricia ‘Trish’ McKnight

Crisis Support/Mentor/Key Note Speaker/Radio Host/Author

‘My Justice’ Finally sharing the voice stolen away so long ago.

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamstalkradio

http://www.Shopping4Survivors.com

www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

~~Always believe anything is possible with you in the active equation~~

The distorted views, perceptions, value I passed forward……

Coming from my history where sexual activity, alcohol, drugs, and value was only felt through being desired by a man; I’ve done some pretty horrible things in my life.

“If someone wanted to have sex with me, then I was worthy of existence”

My only perceived value was in my sexuality as an object, not as a person. Needless to say, seeing my value only through my being wanted by a man flowed into my adult relationships and my example as a mother. The broken spirit of ugliness, overweight teen with scarred disfigured skin from not bathing; black broken fangs for teeth from never having a toothbrush or given the human kindness and decency for proper hygiene; the teen I was with all my distorted perceptions felt grateful for any man wanting to be with me or choosing me as their wife.

“I was well trained to be submissive; accepting their degradation, control, beatings and almost murderous actions because I was nothing without them.”

Carrie Underwood– ‘Blown Away’

This pattern of life was all I knew, it was who I was as a person. The training of all those childhood nightmares was such a huge part of me and controlled how I viewed my self worth; how I behaved and presented myself to others.

“The value of me was only in what others allowed me to feel.”

To say the least my behaviors and choices we all made with a broken and distorted thought process. These distorted views drove who I chose to have sex with, who I chose as my husband or boyfriends and how I allowed them to control my world.

Sadly it was those ‘bad’ choices and ‘bad’ behaviors that infected my children’s world. It is the greatest regret and guilt I still carry today. They grew up believing that the men in my life were more important and I’m sure my behaviors are what led them to believe this.

“How could they possibly believe they carried more value in my heart, if all of the men controlled my actions as a mother?”

Throughout my marriages and relationships I did everything to perfection to ensure the men were never disappointed. However, ensuring their satisfaction was done for reasons other than their importance to me. I ensured perfection in all details of my home in hopes to keep the man from exploding, which was my biggest and constant concern. I needed them to love me, but even more so I needed them not to harm me or my children. Thankfully I can say none of these men ever charged and attacked my children. However, hiding in the closet filled with terror because your mom is being slammed and beaten is nothing a child should ever know. My kids saw their mother’s crying battered body trying to console them and assure them it was nothing. “He was just drunk, just upset because of something I did or didn’t do, or listen as their stepfather beat me and raged because of something the kids had or hadn’t done, which I didn’t correct to the standards expected. Of course there were the times when he raged and beat me damning the kids, “How horrible they were and how I didn’t make them do this or that.” My kids absorbed this and perceived the beating and rage as their mother being battered because of their ‘BAD’ behavior.

“I accepted and tolerated this and then went to be sure this or that was never done again. What view did this give to the children? How could they possibly see themselves as being my most important concern?”

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Artwork Created and Provided by the magnificent talent of Michal Madison

Advocate/Watercolor Artist/Talk Radio Host Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery Radio   http://www.michalmadisonart.com

There were extremes of these nights of rage that resulted in a family round table meeting with me, my 11 year old son, my 9 year old daughter, and my 6 year old daughter. Sometimes these round table meeting even included their father, whom I would call to come join us and then in my distorted thinking that I was trying to get them safe; I would ask my children who they wanted to live with and ask them to make a decision to leave me and go back to a man that ruled with an iron fist, a slap, a dancing leather strap.

“My poor babies, how could they think their mother wasn’t choosing to send them away for being bad or not worthy or not important enough for me to take us all and run?”

Thankfully, this is exactly what I started working on after a doctor insisted on my getting help at the local psychiatric counseling center when he was treating me for some broken bones and stressed out nerves. During my first round of therapy I began to understand how the demons of my childhood trained me to be so controlled by the men in my life and believe that getting beaten was completely normal. My eyes started to open and my soul started falling apart. A new me was found and the strength started to grow inside. The belief in my personal value was born and I started trying to escap0e the insane relationship. Twenty years of my adult life was spent in this destructive, volatile environment of distorted through processes and choices; even worse my children had to live and grow in this mess, be influenced and forced to accept it as well.

Thankfully I finally found the courage, the belief, the determination to leave and get my children and I into our own SAFE environment. Yes there was still the need to be loved, to find love, to have someone want me for me and there would be more boyfriends to come and go, but we would have our home and I wasn’t tolerating anymore raging, abusive, controlling behaviors. No one would control what my child did or didn’t do, except of course for me.

“It wasn’t perfect but we were a family. We were safe in our own home, although it took a couple years to finally get there. We were close to each other, had dinner together quietly, happily with laughter and tears as we discussed their day each evening. It was our SAFE HAVEN!!”

Unfortunately there was already much damage done by the time this happened. My behavior to go out drinking once a week, dress up sexy and go seek out the ‘value’ I still had issues with in myself, influenced my children’s view of personal value and what was acceptable behavior. My daughter’s were the most impacted by these behaviors and how they grew to see their own value through their sexuality and needing to be wanted and loved, accepted by a man to be a complete and worthy person.

Everything that encompassed how I viewed my own value by needing to have someone want me or want to be with me, all of these distorted thought processes is exactly what has left the deepest impression on my children, especially my baby girls.

This is now the root of all I commit myself to working on each day. It is my drive to end the insanity of generational abuse and/or the acceptance of family/relationship violence. It is an even greater hope that I can give my children a new perception of their mother and, even more so, themselves. To leave this world knowing that I gave it my all to change what I had so deeply wounded in them and distorted in their perception of their own personal value is what keeps my heart pounding each day. Every soul of broken mess that I can touch through the website, the radio shows, my writings; those who carry the same distorted perceptions because of what happened and how we are trained as children to see our value and worth, to be submissive and accept the brutal actions of others – this is the belief and the generational cycle of soul destruction we can no longer allow.

For my children; Brett, Jessica, Miranda…….

I give you this ————

‘The Reason’ by Hoobastank © 2003 Island Def Jam Music Group–Official Video

Change what you can for your children before there is no second chance. I am grateful to have this chance and pray that I change what I have influenced in their lives today!!!

~~Love you always my babies~~

~~See your value in all that you hold within~~

Patricia A. McKnight

Author: ‘My Justice’

Advocate/Speaker/Writer/Talk Radio Prod & Host/Survivor

Founder: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery & Talk Radio Programming

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery

http://www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

© All rights officially copyrighted and protected Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery 2012