This cancer eating away at our society……

Ya know, I just don’t get it???~!!!

Back in 2009, I was writing my way through healing; it was scary for me to reach out to others who’d been through similar history. I could write it out to myself; I could write it out to my children, but I could not yet verbalize exactly what happened. It shocked my system every time I went back to read through what’d flowed out of my memories.

I’d only started putting my memories and the details of the attacks together in the different processes of therapy. I had started journaling a bit here and there before, but this was the first at bringing them all together. Let’s face it, if you know anything about my history then you know there’s a lot of shit involved. What I found out was a three-part healing process almost always occurred after each attack shared.

First I’d write it through, which would kick off the cycle by swinging my emotions into breakdown. The more intense the attack the more intense the breakdown. I’d start feeling a sense of anger inside, which came out at the wrong people sometimes. Finally I’d go into a deep sense of calm before getting back into the “normal” of life.

My amazing therapist and I talked through this, which didn’t really seem to help so much at first, but thankfully I connected with her and found it so worth the process. There was a lot of different thoughts, fears, emotions I needed to work through and I was terrified!!! Believe it or not there was more than one session that even she broke down and a point that we both had to take a break because of getting so overwhelmed.

Then she started giving me these lists of Positive Affirmations at each session. She insisted I carry these with me everywhere, all the time!! At the end of our appointment she would go over the new affirmations she had chosen and she’d give me a hug. It drove me insane that I had to stop after an hour.

“Why did I have to open such a deep wound and then just walk out of the room? Didn’t she realize what this did to me? What was I supposed to do with all I felt?”

I chose to start writing to my children. At that time didn’t think about putting it into a book. People who knew a piece of my past would tell me that it would be worth reading, but I surely didn’t think anyone would ever care about my voice. Once I had gotten the journals to present date, I decided that what happened needed to be shared in hopes it could help save someone else.

Now just 3 years later, I am excited to be one of at least 100 other voices that I am connected with, who are sharing their story publicly in some way. They are speaking to others, counseling and supporting others. Some are advocating, painting, writing books, articles or blogs. Others are creating National or World Wide Events; some are choosing to reach out privately with friends or family. Then you have others that are coming forward to testify in public trials and have their abuser prosecuted!!!

So I ask this, “When will this pandemic of abuse and violence get the attention of our media and even more importantly, our law makers? Why aren’t our politicians, our schools, and our neighbors willing to speak about this topic? Don’t we talk about the crime of bullying? Isn’t this the worst type of bullying? Afterall, these crimes are about power over another human being and nothing else!!!

When I look at the Illinois Department of Children & Family Services Reports, I can see the reports of child abuse and it astounds me that people are refusing to talk about such a prevalent crime. There are crimes of abuse against our children, in this state, occurring every 4.6 seconds and 79 deaths related to domestic disturbances in 2011, which you will find on the home page of Illinois Coalition Against Domestic Violence. http://www.state.il.us/DCFS/docs/CANTS2010.pdf & http://www.ilcadv.org/resources/statistics/FY10DataSheet.pdf . These are vicious crimes of Assault, Battery, Aggravated Sexual Battery; Assault with a Deadly Weapon and more. It goes deeper in to reach the emotional battery, financial captivity and brainwashing of another human being.

“How outraged we would be if a stranger committed any of these crimes!!!”

This is even worse because these crimes are being committed by those we live with, most of whom we are dependent upon in some way. The criminals aren’t strangers, they are what the law sees as Domestic or Parental.

“Apparently when it is one of these related to us in some way – THEN IT IS NOT A CRIME!!” Really??? Why not???

What makes the acts of violence from someone related to us; someone who resides with us or used to reside with us; what makes this any less a crime???

Imagine if these were punished for the crimes they are. I know our prisons would not be able to handle all of these attackers. What if we put people to work by building a facility in each county that would hold just these who attack someone they live with? Build one facility for those who offend against their partner/spouse/boyfriend or girlfriend, then build another for those who attack children within their residence or one who is a relative.

This action would promote employment. It would give a greater good by providing a prosecution deserved of these crimes and a sense of justice for the victims. A child who is left to grow up at the access of their abuser will have long-term physical and mental health issues. I am one myself who suffers the aftermath. It is already proven that these crimes can lead to conditions such as; P.T.S.D., Depression, Personality Disorders and physical problems such as Fibromyalgia and other Auto Immune Diseases. It breaks down our ability to fight off these conditions, which can also lead to a lifetime of either emotional or physical disability. This alone creates a severe impact on our economy.

The Center for Disease Control reports an estimated cost of $124 BILLION a year to support those recovering or left damaged from these criminal attacks of child maltreatment. They also show costs exceeding $8.3 BILLION a year for the direct consequences of Intimate Partner Violence.

http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/childmaltreatment/index.html

http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/intimatepartnerviolence/consequences.html

“How is it that our politician’s refuse to touch on this topic, especially during election time? Why aren’t we as a society outraged about this? Not just the crimes themselves but what it costs the government in funding, which is being cut more & more each year, but also about the severity of these crimes and the long-term damage of its victims. How can we be aware of these facts and their costs, but still put our head in the sand?

“You cannot UNKNOW something!!!” So what is the explanation that anyone has for being silent or forcing someone else into silence when these crimes sneak in to invade our lives?

I pray that after reading this you will be a bit more enlightened and empowered to speak with knowledge and conviction about this cancer eating away at our society. If this were a medical disease we would be pulling out all the stops to raise funds and battle against it, but because it happens within what should be the safety & privacy of our homes, we choose to turn away and pretend we don’t know about it; hoping secretly that someone else will step up to report it or do something about it. Our politicians only get involved when we as people make them live up to the job they were put in office to uphold!!! They’ve got a lot on their plate to deal with right now, but hey, my ideas aren’t half bad and it would help with our financial status and put people back to work.

The victims of these crimes, either child or adult, truly need to have their voices counted now more than ever. Show the public and our law makers just how wrong, the already shocking statistics, really are. There isn’t anyone within the reach of cable television that isn’t aware of the violence within our homes. Intimate Partner Violence and Child Abuse; Sexual Assault & Abuse; these crimes are being shared in the news and in the movies, sit-coms, daily Soap Operas and more, even after school specials are touching on these subjects.

Victims, if you are still trapped in this abuse, I beg you to please reach out for help!!!!

Survivors, I beg you to have your voice counted and your story heard, not just for others but also for your own healing.

Public, I beg you to please get outraged over these crimes!!! Surely if it happened to someone you know and love, you wouldn’t be so quick to turn away!!!

Positive Affirmations for You:

You deserve to be safe

You deserve respect

You deserve kindness

You deserve as much love as you freely give to others

You deserve roses in your garden of life

(c) Patricia A. McKnight

Advocate/Author/Speaker/Survivor & Dreamcatchers Talk Radio Host

“My Justice” – see links for Amazon.com/Authorhouse.com/BN.com in blogroll

http://www.facebook.com/triciagirl62

http://www.dreamcatchersforabusedchildren.com

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/dreamcatchers

To make a report of Child Maltreatment – 1-800-422-4453 Childhelp Helpline http://www.childhelp.org/

To make a report of Intimate Partner Violence – 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) National Center of Domestic Violence http://www.ncadv.org/

To make a report of Sexual Assault – 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) RAINN http://www.rainn.org/

International Parental Abduction w/ Peter Thomas Senese

Dreamcatchers for Abused Children

Blog Talk Radio

Special Guest

Peter Thomas Senese & Attny. Ann Marquez

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/dreamcatchers/2012/05/10/child-abuse-and-survival-education-with-patricia-mcknight

Tonight on the Dreamcatchers Blog Talk Radio our host & Exec. Director, Tricia McKnight, will be sitting in with two very special guests from the I CARE Foundation. Please join us in welcoming Author/Advocate Peter Thomas Senese and Attorney Ann Marquez, who are joining me for a sit down Q & A on the I CARE Foundation and International Parental Abduction.

Peter and Ms. Ann Marquez, who previously held the position of Senior Litigator for New York State Child Protective Services, are going to give us a few inside bits to the mess we call CPS; as well we will be chatting about a few of their recent international rescues of kidnapped children. They are also going to share with us what we can expect to see from this amazing team as they move forward in this battle to help prevent the abduction and human trafficking of our children.

Most parents may never know the fear of having their child kidnapped by the opposite parent and taken to a country where the laws to protect them from Pedophilia or Trafficking are not viewed with the harsh objectiveness as here in the United States. Some of us have known the anguish of having them stolen into another state or taken wrongly by the Protective Social Services unit. This leaves a parent with a mind racing full of unimaginable fear and worry over what could happen to their child; I am one of those parents and know this huge depth of pain that takes over our world. But imagine your child being taken out of the country!!! Where do you go for help? Who can you call to find out what resources are available to help you get them back? This is the amazing team at the I CARE Foundation who review laws and fight the international borders to hunt for these children and return them to the custodial loving parent.

Tonight’s discussion with Peter & Ann will be something for all of us to listen in on. We may never have to go through this unimaginable fear, but we may be the one to see a kidnapped child while out on vacation to another country or perhaps while out on a cruise ship. We want you to know what to do and also who to contact if you are the Chasing Parent and as in Peter Thomas Senese’s best-selling novel, what to expect when you are “Chasing the Cyclone”.

Please encourage your family and friends to join in for another great discussion on the Dreamcatchers Blog Talk Radio tonight. We begin our broadcast at 9pm e.s.t. and our phone lines are always open to allow your thoughts, shares, and questions. You can call in to listen or chat live at (917)932-1132. Please help protect the safety of all children and stay vigilant with us in this battle to end the many abuses against them.

Here are a few links to find out more about tonight’s special guests:

http://www.peterthomassenese.com/

http://www.chasingthecyclone.com/Abduction_Documentary.html

http://www.chasingthecyclone.com/CHASING_THE_CYCLONE_Home_Pa.php

Mark A. Palmer & Jessica’s Law Now on the BTR!!

 

Dreamcatchers for Abused Children

Blog Talk Radio

Welcomes Tonight

Mark A. Palmer

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/dreamcatchers/2012/05/08/child-abuse-and-survival-education-with-patricia-mcknight

 Tonight on our Blog Talk Radio, Host & Exec. Director, Tricia McKnight welcomes a man who fights endlessly to help locate and find our missing children. Please join us as we share a great discussion with Mr. Mark A. Palmer!!

Mark is a tireless advocate who strives above and beyond to locate our missing children. Having worked hard to enact some version of Jessica’s Law into 44 states. He and his organization have worked in over 500 cases of missing children and make it their mission to fight for tougher laws. The importance of creating laws across our nation to protect our children from the many pedophiles, monsters & murderers is very crucial. Please join in as we share all that Mark and the Jessica’s Law Now organization is doing to ensure just that.

Our blog talk program this evening is very important for all to get involved. We will be sharing not only about Jessica’s Law but also about some of the missing children that this organization is working at locating now, including Isabel Celis. If you recall there has been a lot of posts concerning this little girl’s disappearance. This beautiful little 6-year-old was stolen in the middle of the night while her family slept. Some 17 Sex Offenders that lived close by have already been interviewed and cleared. Where is this child and the many millions more who are missing? How can we help ensure that Amber Alerts are passed immediately for ALL MISSING CHILDREN???

Join in at 9pm e.s.t. tonight as we talk about these subjects with Mark. We encourage you to invite your family and friends to get involved. It is important that we reach out to all of society when we are discussing the protection of our children. Remember our phone lines will be open, which you can call in to share or listen by calling (917)932-1132.

***Mark will not be taking any calls related to specific cases of missing children tonight. This is a time to update everyone on the continued efforts of this organization to enact Jessica’s Law Now & Amber Alerts. We will be discussing a few of the major cases of missing children that they are working on at this time. You must contact your local law enforcement agency to report a missing child or question a specific case.***

Here are a few sites where you can find out more about our guest:

Facebook for Mark A. Palmer: https://www.facebook.com/mpalmer7

Jessica’s Law Now Blog: http://jessicaslawnow.wordpress.com/

Center for Missing & Exploited Children: http://www.missingkids.com/missingkids/servlet/PublicHomeServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US&

Email to President Obama-Stand on Child Abuse!!!

Email to President Obama

Sent – May 03, 2012

Who Will Stand 

For

Our Children!!!

 Dear President Obama:

 You don’t know me. I don’t have money; in fact I am on Disability because of an injury from Domestic Violence. I am now a full-time volunteer for Dreamcatchers for Abused Children, based out of Peck, Michigan. However, I live in Breese Illinois and what I do is mostly online.

In March I was appointed as Exec. Director of their blog talk programming. I am also a survivor of 12 yrs. of severe sadistic abuse from my stepfather, complete sacrifice of me by my mother. All medical and dental needs were ignored even though we had excellent health insurance from UMWA, but not so much as a tooth-brush could be provided for the rotting little girl.The neglect of my mother was so extreme that as a skin infection ate away at my arms and legs from not being able to have the safety to bathe in my home, she never cared or provided the medical treatment that was needed to stop it. For a period of 5 years I could not bathe and the infection left me scarred on every inch of skin that covered my arms and legs. I went to school with black rotting teeth, front teeth that were visible. My arms and legs and deep rotting infected sores on them and everyone dodged contact with me.

 A community of 1500 people knew who I was and who to contact if I did something wrong. A school system I attended for a repeated 9 years never asked about the silent girl whose skin was literally rotting away. The school mates who attended our many late night parties,were provided with drugs and alcohol, then were asked who would be the first to take me in the back and give me what I deserved, but no one ever offered to care. The police and neighbors who witnessed the girl getting beaten in the street, walking around with multiple bruises, drug by the hair and worse. Still with all of this no one ever said a word or questioned my parents. In Feb. 2011 I published my story, “My Justice”, is out there and I changed the names of the many who abused me throughout 32 years of my life, mainly because it wasn’t about the who but about the what was done.

In this novel I apologized to my children for the way my abuse had flowed into their lives and distorted their world. It meant most to me that if my story could help just one person gain the courage to speak out and heal for themselves rather than continue on the self-destructive path of despair, depression, P.T.S.D. and even dissociation; this makes me happiest. However, I must say that since becoming highly involved with Dreamcatchers I have succeeded many times at helping others heal and speak out,but there is still no direct attention where it needs to be. The laws of child abuse need to be radically changed!! Social Workers need to be made accountable for their actions. There are so many levels of wrong on this very important issue of protecting our most valuable asset, our children. I summed up the courage to send First Lady Obama a copy of “My Justice” along with a three page letter, which begged for her beautiful passion of family to be used to acknowledge the estimated 60 million survivors who, like me, have allowed their lives to be shattered and keep these secrets of horrific trauma, so that their family and work peers would not shame them. It is time, Sir, for the blame and shame to be put on the pedophiles and monsters who harm our children. We need to provide better resources to help children move past the abuse and heal so that they can achieve their dreams and possibly be the next great President of our America. Mr. President, I am not famous; I am not rich to put money into your campaign or into any other organization or political stand. I am a nobody, Sir, just a common citizen of this country trying very hard to devote all she has left to help change the laws and protect our children.

Sir, I know that the politician who makes Child Abuse a campaign issue will have the support of some many millions of citizens. There are so very many who are searching for someone to be vocal and let them know that it is alright, it is safe to talk, it is safe to take this stand. Please Mr. President, perhaps you will talk with your wife and find out if she received the book copy and the letter. You may want to read it yourself, but I warn you it is a true and graphic account of what happened. My former teachers have read it and apologized for letting me slip through the cracks. They said my book was so well written on the subject of being a silent surviving child of horrific torment that it should be used as a guide to teach others. The reviews I am getting from others on the story is the same, from counselors, survivors, advocates.

 In closing Mr. President, I beg you to take a stand on this issue. You have stood strong on our economy, our war, our joint communication between the lines of government; YOU SIR ARE STRONG ENOUGH TO DO THIS!!! Please help the many who are buried and tormented by these vicious and heinous crimes. Children are having to live with these monsters, 93% of all abuse is by someone the child loves and trusts. Our children will not speak against their parents and family so teachers and counselors have to be better educated and trained to pick up on the signs of the silently screaming child. Please Mr. President, please help our children, protect them, save them. Thank you and I hope you do get to read this, as I am sure you get many other emails about other issues. We protect our animals, do commercials to help children in other countries; we need to protect our children.

Sincerely,

Patricia A. McKnight

Author: “My Justice”

Tears in April……

“TEARS in APRIL”

by:

Advocate/Author/Speaker/Trainer/Talk Radio Host/Survivor

Founder: Butterfly Dreams Abuse Recovery

http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery

Author: "My Justice"

Ms. Tricia McKnight

“Patricia A. McKnight”

Author: “My Justice”

We are now into the last full week of April 2012, Do you know what special awareness month this is supposed to be? This blog will explain why this question is so very important as we go along.

First let me say that I never used to know what the true specialty of this month meant; neither did any of my friends. To me this is extremely sad and in all honesty, a bit scary.

Throughout this month so far, I’ve been watching and looking around, kind of listening to see if anyone picks up on this and what they are pushing for during April. I’ve seen and heard about awareness for things such as, Autism; Sexual Assault, and on our local news, I even heard an announcement for Hairball Awareness Day!!! All I can say is Wow!!!

Now don’t think for a moment that I am down playing Autism or Sexual Assault. The Autism disease actually effects 1 in 100 of our children, Sexual Assault (Rape) effects 1 in 4 women & 1 in 6 men according to national reports from many available web sites. Definitely these are an important issue and we do need to support them, but Hairball Day, do we really need that one?

The saddest part of this Awareness in April and the reason for this post title, is that APRIL IS CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION MONTH!!! Shouldn’t this be the direct and most important awareness issue for this special month? I don’t know about your area, but in my small mid-western area of South-Central Illinois, the only child abuse awareness or discussion has been the Balloon Release Event that I initiated.

I do know through my contacts and friends on the social media sites that many other Child Abuse Advocates and organizations have done a special awareness events  for this month. Those I am aware of personally are gaining in strength.

Please support:

Stop Abusing Your Children – Stacey & Jeff Sutphen – They have filmed and are fighting now for the share of a Public Service Announcement, which so far is going to be shared on Bravo!!!

NAASCA.org – Bill Murray and his amazing team hosted a truly honoring event in their area of Sacramento, CA along with “Army of Angels” to kick off a two-week long commemoration of Child Abuse Prevention Cross Country Motorcycle Run. 

Debbie Splawn-Bunch – Dreamcatchers for Abused Children National Spokesperson – Held the first annual Candle Light Vigil at Cole’s Garden in Oklahoma City, OK. She and her local citizens, who had been hit by a series of tornados the day before, attended and asked us around the country to dedicate a moment of silence for our children as we remember those who have been destroyed and even killed by the crimes of abuse.

Tricia McKnight –  Held the first annual Balloon Release Event in Breese, IL. and our local citizens showed support through silent auction donations and more. Our local Mayor, Charlie Hilmes and my Fourth Grade Teacher, Ms. Linda Walcher took part and gave a few moments of speech in the support of our event and discussed the extreme silence of this crime and how our children can so easily be overlooked when burdened in shame and secrecy. We also had a special share from Mr. Carl Hart who is a member of the NAASCA organization and supporter of Just Tell, teens reaching out to teens.

So with all of the above news, why do I say,”Tears in April”? Think for just a moment about this very important fact; EVERY 5 SECONDS A CHILD IS BEING HURT OR RAPED BY SOMEONE THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO TRUST WITH THEIR SAFETY!!! In fact, most of these children have to live, eat dinner and sleep in the same house, with the person who is causing this pain. Their lives are being destroyed and then they are forced to carry the secrets of what happened within their home. They’re going to school every day worrying about what could happen to them that night. NEVER knowing from one moment to the next if the very safety of their home will change into evil and attack them.

To think that this very special awareness in the month of April is not getting recognition;  published in every newspaper and TV station across the globe, is not only disheartening for our children but extremely sad. Our children are depending on us to provide them with love, guidance, support and yes, even necessary correcting/parenting, but we cannot even give their lives ONE MONTH OF TRIBUTE. This is an utmost cruelty and sadness for them. What will they think of us as people when this new generation gets old enough to understand this meaning?

Overall child abuse has increased due to the state of our global and national economy. Child deaths are now estimated at 5 each day, but in Illinois alone we lost 161 children from abuse & neglect in 2010. We also had a total of 9,457 cases of Sexual Abuse, this is just across our one state. What are the stats of your state? Check the DCFS or DHS/CPS web sites for your state to find out.

The fact that these numbers continue to rise and we cannot Nationally Recognize & Support the efforts to bring a huge awareness across our country for their safety and well-being is so tragic. What will they think of us indeed? How will they see our views on this issue? What examples are we giving them? We see commercials constantly about the support for Animals; Children Abroad; and many different diseases, but the most serious disease, the cancer eating away at our human kindness, does not get the major support across our states. Everyone seems to feel drawing attention to this evil makes it too real to accept, but for the majority of our generations this evil has been accepted as “Normal”; “Not Damaging”; “Just a Part of Life”, for centuries now. I have to ask, “When will this crime and torture of our children no longer be accepted”?

It has been proven that the long-term effect of Abuse, the emotional and mental health treatment of those who survive these horrific traumas, is costing our country an estimated $124 Billion Dollars a year!!! You can find this fact and many more about the life long effect from Child Abuse and Rape on the National Institute for Mental Health or http://www.nimh.gov  Survivors are often so deeply affected with major signs being overwhelming between the ages of late 20’s to mid 30’s, when we are becoming adults and parents ourselves. This causes our families and marriages to be destroyed. It causes us so much physical and emotional damage that maintaining stability in our lives and being a productive member of society is almost impossible. The worst effect from abuse is the cycle that carries it forward to invade the live’s of our own children, either by our actions or our decisions; such as allowing this to continue as an UN-NOTICED CRIME!!

Please join with me and the many other organizations, foundations, and advocates who stand and encourage you to take part in the awareness and educational events for the last remaining week of April. We need to come together as a society to give true honor, support and the public attention that our children deserve!!! Why should it be so shameful to speak publicly and support the safety of our children? We can stop the “Tears in April” by changing our view of this subject. Simply watching and caring about the children in our circles is a small way to make a very big difference. They need to see our sincere love and deep appreciation of who they are and the possibilities of who they can become. If we are the generation that begins this movement to protect them and provide a positive influence in their lives, look at what changes they can bring to our world. One or more of them may be the scientist who creates a cure for Cancer, Aids, Autism, Schizophrenia; maybe even a pill to prevent a prone nature of violence. How can we as a human race turn away and ignore this special month? How can we not have huge Blue Ribbons of support or Walks for Awareness; beautiful Candle Light Vigils across the country? How is it that we cannot provide a DONATED television commercial to run on all local stations across the country? How can we not find those famous voices of support from Actors/ Actresses/ Government Officials and more to stand up and speak out against these heinous crimes? How can we continue to turn away from the SURVIVORS OF ABUSE and tell them to “Just get over it”??!!!

This blog is one of the many publications from Author, Patricia A. McKnight and is held in the same copy write for the novel, “My Justice” and all other information pertaining to her articles, books, blogs, and more. You can join with me on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/triciagirl62 or on Twitter @triciagirl62. There is also a women’s private support group that I founded and mange online through Facebook. If you are interested in being a member please send a “Friend Request” so that we can connect and talk further. 

I strongly encourage anyone who is a survivor of childhood abuse to speak up and be heard, use your voice and your story to help create a world wide awareness to the horrific nature of these crimes and the devastating long term effect that plagues our lives and continues to destroy the children of our next generation. Please stand with us and be the generation that screams out to all, “NO MORE ABUSE AGAINST OUR CHILDREN”!!! 

 

Contact: p.mcknight@charter.net

Visit: http://www.butterflydreamsabuserecovery.com

RADIO SHOWS – http://www.blogtalkradio.com/butterflydreamsabuserecovery